Who Is Who? (Cate Blanchett x Female OC)

"Please listen!"

Chapter Four

It was a few weeks before Winter. The late Autumn skies were the clearest during the year and all you could see looking up were different shades of deep blue. It felt like you could drown in it. Like it was going to crash down on you at any given moment during the day. It felt exciting though, giving something to live and breathe for. It was like an ocean - you could never predict when it decided to let loose. Or it was like Cate's eyes. With both, she'd love to drown in them.

A few stray weeks had come to pass and go. They felt like a big blur of work, papers, and mental struggles. Nothing that resembled their lives. Really, as a star, shouldn't it be interesting to be one? People adored you, so why was it so tough?

The bigger part of her job was paperwork. People, in and out of her office. Actors - countless lines said wrong. The crew - wrong angles, and microphone placement. And a lot of papers on her desk. Messily disorganized on every shelf. But she loved it, somehow. Cordelia managed to push through the signatures and get to the better part of her job. For actual fun times during filming. For the cast.

Cordelia had come to terms with her 'everything-Cate' illness, or as she called it so. She hadn't figured what it was, but it felt familiar. So she walked the way the familiarity led her to. It was better than walking in blind and without any experience. The brunette was close to thinking it was some kind of affection. Or something she had long left behind in her past, but something that remained deeper within her. Something she wasn't completely aware of and something that she couldn't be. Not until it was painfully obvious, anyway, was her last conclusion.

It took a while to get used to comparing everything to Cate (even Dabby, who was nothing like the older woman). But Cordelia managed, even with the few stressful nights she broke down in her balcony, the few nights she put out her cigarettes on her skin because she simply loathed not being normal. Not having Cate invade her mind each evening. Cordelia forgot what it felt to be normal. 

It was another early morning on set, but it was still empty and eerily quiet. She was alone like she always liked to be. It saved the hassle of walking through the crew and having to avoid getting hit on the face with a twenty-pound camera. A nasty bruise that would leave...

They were starting to film that day, as the costumes and the crew were ready, and the paperwork situated with it was signed. Cordelia already felt like the best part of her job was coming to a start. If there was one thing she liked, it was bossing people around. And as a director, that was most of her job.  And bossing around made her focus completely. There never was a thing between her and her job. Except sometimes Dabby and her hilarious quotes. 

Cordelia entered her office, which was just a trailer situated the closest to the set. They were in the woods for the first shots, as it resembled what the brunette imagined. She wanted the best, truest quality she could get. Which meant going full out, even travelling a lot. 

She let out a rushed breath as she dropped her bag on the desk beside her small sofa. Since they were travelling through places, not every trailer was moved, which unfortunately got her to share with Cate. Not Dabby, like she had expected in the first place. Martha had an odd way of setting things up. Cordelia refused to think about it too much. She was sure it would only take a few days to shoot the first shots and she doesn't spend too much time in the trailer either way. She just hoped Cate wouldn't be as persistent as she used to be. 

The brunette exited the trainer once she was set for the day, deciding to walk around the forest, that was fully set up for filming. She wandered off further, where the set couldn't catch her eye anymore. It was warm, as it usually was. Even when it was almost winter. Sometimes she missed the colder weather of England, even when it was completely unpredictable.