I could not fucking believe him. Richie Tozier, my boyfriend of eight months, just dumped me. He wouldn't even tell me why, he just said we were over, and that he lost feelings. What a piece of shit.
Only one person in the world could make me feel better, Michael Hanlon. He had just joined our group but he was by far the kindest soul in the group.
I walk into his farm. "Mike?" I call out. I see him in the corner, petting a sheep.
"Y/n, what a surprise." He says, standing up. "Are you ok?"
"No, Richie broke up with me, said he 'lost feelings', whatever the fuck that means."
Mike sighs, "I'm so sorry, y/n, you don't deserve that at all." He grabs my hand. "Here, some animal therapy always helps me." He leads me over to a pen with two little lambs, lying down together inside. "One of our sheep gave birth to twins." He smiles. "Go on. You can pet them."
He calls the lambs over to the gate. They get up, hurrying over, pretty excited to see him. I reach my hand in there and pet the fluffy scruff on their heads.
"They're so cute." I smile. Mike looks at me.
"You have a beautiful smile, y/n." He tell me.
I look at him, blushing. "You think so?" He chuckles, looking down.
"I'm shocked Richie broke up with someone like you. How could he loose feelings for someone who is just as funny as him, someone who knows how to make everyone smile. Not to mention you're super pretty." I stand there, speechless.
"You barely know me, Mike." I look down, continuing to pet the sheep.
"Well," Mike says, petting the other lamb. "I feel like I have known you forever." He sighs. "Richie is stupid sometimes, he doesn't know what he's lost yet. Men wire differently. After a breakup, we feel like we're 'free', and then a few months later, we realize how perfect they actually were. Women are the opposite." He tells me.
"How are you so all knowing about breakups?" I ask him, teasing. He laughs, he always had such a calming laugh. So smooth and soothing.
"You're not the only one who has gone through heartbreak." He smiles sadly, clearly remembering her.
I wanted to know more. "Mike Hanlon? Going through a heartbreak?" There it is, that laugh again.
"She was my muse." He tells me. "I used to sing. I wrote so many songs for her. We dated for a year and a half. I left her after her sister died. I thought she was becoming too clingy, and codependent, and that she needed to work on herself." He sighs. "The first two months without her, I was fine. I just went on my normal life, not caring." He takes a deep breath. "Four months in, I really started to miss her, I stopped singing, stopped writing songs. I wanted her back, but by then, it was too late."
"She found someone else?" I questioned. Mike now had tears coming on. He shook his head.
"No, she wanted to be with her sister." He chokes. "She left a note to me. She said 'Mike, thank you. Thank you for everything. Please don't blame yourself for this, this was my decision. You were an amazing boyfriend, it's just that when I lost you, I had nothing else. I lost two of the most amazing people in my life. I will never forget all you have done for me. I love you.'"
I look at him, surprised. He memorized her suicide note.
"All she wanted was for me to comfort her, to be there for her, and I just couldn't." He sighs. "And I blame myself, every single day, for her death. If I had only been there for her, if I had only helped her instead of pushing her away, she might still be alive. She might even be a part of the Loser's Club."
"Well, we have a whole initiation, but sure yeah I could see that." Mike smiles.
"You are so like Richie." He laughs. "Maybe that's why it didn't work out, because you both are so similar."
I look at him, puzzled. "I thought that would be why we would work out, because we are so similar."
Mike shakes his head. "Sometime, it's not good to be too similar, sometimes, you want to find someone who's different, it gives you a different perspective on things. Helps you realize something from someone else's point of view."
I nod my head. "That must be why I didn't cry when Richie was breaking up with me, I was just mad. We both have anger issues, and maybe if I cried, we could actually have talked it out."
"Just accept it and move on, he clearly was not the one for you. As awkward as it may be for the rest of the group, it will fade eventually. Now, I know you and Richie, you will try to get as many people from our group on either of your sides as possible."
I scoff. "Come on, do I seem that immature?" He raises an eyebrow at me. "Ok, but like, you would choose me right?" He laughs.
"If you need to get away from Richie, you can always come to me." Mike offers. "My door is always open."
I smile. "Thanks, Mike. You're really good at this. You should become a therapist."
He chuckles. "I don't know if I'm THAT good, but I'll keep that in mind. I'll see you later?"
"Yeah, you will." I smile, walking out the door. My cheeks heat up as I think about Mike, and everything he said.
We were two totally different people, and maybe, just maybe, that would be ok in the future. I never knew these things about Mike, and I don't think anyone else did either. That means I was the first person he told this to.
I felt all bubbly inside, I never felt this way with Richie, even when we were together. Maybe that meant Richie and I had no connection at all. And maybe we weren't meant to be.
Oh well, still gonna try and get the Loser's on my side. I have one, time to go get one more.
But maybe Mike was all I really needed.
