devil's berry

Chapter 5

I fell to the floor and wrapped my arms around my torso, crying quietly. I wish I could say I fought him off and went to the police, but this is no story book and life isn’t and never will be quite that fare. 

He sat on the sofa and I must make him dinner, but I know if I’m late, I’ll be beaten. I set out the dinner on the table and call Jake and my father in to eat. Then I leave, knowing I’m not welcome to eat today, because of my behaviour.

Even if I could eat, I would only get the scraps off my brother’s plate, if he left any. That’s the only meal I’m allowed all day and I should be grateful. I don’t complain though for if I did, I would be killed.

I sit on my bed reading a book about a girl who is like me. Her mum left her, and she lives with her dad who is so poor that they must live in a caravan owned by her aunty and little cousins.

The book makes me angry because her dad still loves her and is trying. She doesn’t know what it’s like but then again, no one does. I put the book down and look in the mirror.

I sigh. A scary 16-year-old girl I no longer recognise is staring back at me. I have shoulder length red hair and a face full of makeup, to hide the bruises I get from the violence in and out of school. my eyes are black and hollow as if I am emotionless, but I know I’m not that lucky.

My tail is oily and unclean, just like my ears and I keep them that way. my horns and wings are showing to try and scare people away from me, but it never seems to work, and people still see my vulnerable self underneath. I was older than I appeared. Willowy and with a small bust I could pass for twelve, but in truth I was closer to seventeen. With elfin features, fluffy ears, a puffy white tail and short hair, I was still considered "cute" to those who didn’t know me.

But I didn't want to be "cute," wasn't sixteen years of that enough? Now I craved sexiness and the attention that went with it. I longed to be wanted and I didn’t care how.

Not since my mum died in that car crash. I wore short skirts with fishnet tights and heeled boots, all a shade of black or deep grey; hoping this will gain me somebody’s time.

As if I was worth it.