~DreamSMP Oneshots~

Dear Diary - Dream x Sapnap

TW: Suicide, self-harm

Dear Diary, 

Today I made a new friend. His name is Nick. We played on the playground a lot and got ice cream. He makes me feel good.

- Clay

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Dear Diary,

I played with Nick again today. His mom is a little mean. When we went to his house, she dropped a bottle, then yelled at Nick for dropping it. It was fine, cause then she slept the rest of the time. We played this game on his computer called Minecraft. I think I'll try to get dad to buy it too.

- Clay

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Dear Diary,

I've been hanging out with Nick more. His brother has his girlfriend over a lot, so we usually chill at my place. Nick says he doesn't want a girlfriend, but he won't tell me why. I don't mind, if anything I agree. I don't need one since I have Nick. I'm sorry I haven't written much recently, I've just been busy with Nick.

- Clay

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dear diary

damn its been a while since the last time i wrote here. im still hanging out with nick, but now i have a secret. it hurts to say it, but i like him. not just as a friend. i know he doesnt like me like that, hes not gay. dad thinks i have a girlfriend too, but shes just my friend. honestly i dont know the next time ill write in here. whatever

clay

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dear diary, 

nick and i started dating! he said that he's liked me for a long time, i cant believe i didn't see it honestly. we were just playing truth or dare and he ended up full-on confessing. sadly, nick's mom got moved into rehabilitation for alcoholism, so nick's been living with us. dad doesn't know we're dating, but we plan on letting him know soon. there's not much else to add. i made the football team, though. and nick made the swim team. i hope our practice schedules don't conflict too much.

- clay

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dear diary

ive been prettty donw recenntly. i dont even knwo why im wrinting in this stupid thing. my fukcing wrists hurt so much. dad kicked me ouut. he ofund out nick and i were dating ands got mad. nikc moved back in with his mmo. im living with mom now too. nick and i aer trying olng distance. im scared

clay

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Dear Diary,

God, I can't believe I'm doing this. The last time Clay wrote in here was about two years ago, damn. He died a few days after that entry, I suppose. He killed himself. In truth, I don't know why I'm writing this. I miss him a lot. For the record, I wish there were a way for him to know I haven't moved on. I love him so much. I wish this world wasn't so messed up that he felt the need to leave it behind, and that I wasn't enough to keep him here. I read through these old entries. They're really cute, I'm glad his mom sent this to me. God I just want to say that to his face. I can't live the right way without him. I wish my love was enough for him. Goodbye Diary, goodbye Clay.

- Nick