The Runaway Groom [On-Hold]

10

It's been two weeks since the show.

And here I am, watching the sunset with Rim. I had a three days vacation with her and Jiro and so far, I had fun.

Actually, this is not a vacation dahil tinakasan ko lang naman ang siyudad para makapagisip-isip at huminga. Masyadong na kasing nakakapagod lahat ng bagay na nangyayare pagkatapos ng encounter namin ni Joseph. At hindi naman kami nag-usap na after the show kasi umalis na kami & there is no communication between the two of us para pag-usapan pa kung maglalabas ba kami ng statements sa lahat ng speculations na nakikita namin sa balita at online. Sabi nila Amber at Jiro, hayaan na lang namin media dahil hindi naman nakakasakit ng tao sa mga nilalabas nilang information but if they did hurt someone because of that news then there is a need for us to do something.

The last time that I watched the sunset was three years ago, and I was with him. I never watched the sunset again after what happened because it reminds me of things that I shouldn't. Nasa kalagitnaan ako ng pag-iisip when Rim broke the silence.

"Yan, can I ask you something, Uhm, very personal?"

I can see the hint of curiosity in her eyes, and something that I can't read so I just gave a smile as a response, and I know she knew what that means.

"Okay. So what happened to you, three years ago? Why did you leave?" She asked.

Why?

"Uhm, I don't know if I can tell you about it right now but at least I can tell you that I did it because I need to," I answered.

Hindi ko pa kayang sabihin sa kanya ang dahilan o kahit na kanino man. Even Jiro, Amber & Zed didn't know anything about it. They do ask me but I'll answer them with the assurance that I'll tell them the reason but not now. And I am thankful that they are not forcing me, they understand what is happening even though they don't know anything. The only thing that they know is that, Tanner helped me with everything when I left the country and that I have an illness. I can say that Tanner knew something but not all.

"It's okay. I understand. Pero, I just noticed something when I meet you during the day of the shoot. There is the time that you look pale o kaya minsan naman nagpapanic ka, is there something that I need to know just in case?" She asked again. I know that she will ask me about those things so I decided that I need to tell her about it.

Pinalipas ko muna ang ilang minuto bago ako nagsalita.

"I have an illness," I said. I glanced at her and shock is visible on her face. "And that is one of the reasons why I didn't go back here because I needed to be cured," I added.

"When I flew to Las Vegas, I didn't know that I have an illness. Napagdesisyunan ko rin na umuwi after six months to clear things and of course to talk to Joseph." I said and cleared my throat.

"Yan, it's okay for me if you wouldn't tell me the whole story. I understand," she said.

"I'll tell you one of the reasons. Don't worry. I trust you. I'll be okay," I replied. She wanted me to stop but no one can stop me right now because she also needs to know the reason. She is my PA after all.

"A week before I flew back, napansin kong lagi akong binabangungot and there are times that Tanner will see me trembling though wala namang nangyayareng hindi maganda. I also experienced panic attacks and flashbacks so napagdesisyunan kong mag-pa check up and I found out that I have Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder."

"Uhm, my doctor asked me if there are serious accidents na nangyare sa akin before. And there is. I got into a serious car accident when I was a kid, lucky of me that I didn't have amnesia but I undergo treatments dahil nagka trauma ako sa aksidente. So it became one of the reasons why I was diagnosed with PTSD. Even the memories of me with Joseph became the cause." I said and smiled sadly at her.

"That is the reason why I look pale or I panic, and Joseph can trigger it kaya nakita mo ako last time na ganun but don't worry about me because I am taking my meds so that I'll stay sane," I added.

She just nodded as a response. I think she's trying to process everything she heard a while ago. Tumikhim muna siya bago nagsalita.

"So, you mean, your memories with him can trigger your illness?" She asked.

I smiled sadly at her and nodded as a response.

"Yes, our memories together can be the death of me," I replied.

"YAN! Wag naman sa 'd' word na yan oh. Hindi yan mangyayare okay?"

I just ignore what she said. Totoo naman eh. Lahat ng alaala ko sakanya, pwedeng ikamatay ko.

The doctor suggested na they'll try to let me forget those memories but I rejected them. Okay lang mamatay ako sa alaalang kasama ko siya, kaysa naman mamatay ako ng wala man lang naaalala tungkol sa kanya.

Nagpaalam na si Rym para bumalik sa loob ng resort. She asked me if I wanted to come with her but I told her na susunod na lang ako. I wanted to be alone.

I am watching the sun being swallowed by sea. It is a very peaceful yet frustrating sight for me.

Sunset.

I smiled bitterly. There are many what ifs running into my mind. Some have been answered but some are not. *sigh*

Personally, I have a part of me saying that it's okay if I get rid of those memories but I just can't.

"Daddyyy!!!" I heard a little voice screamed.

Hinanap ko yung boses at may nakita akong cute na batang babae na tumatakbo sa may dalampasigan. But I frowned because no one is following her. She looked like Mariko. Hys, I miss my sister.

I decided to to follow the little girl dahil wala siyang kasama. Konsensya ko pa kung may mangyareng masama dito.

She suddenly turns around and asked,

"Excuse me mister, are you following me?"

"Hmm, yes baby girl, I am following you. Would you mind if I ask you who are with?"

"Uhm, no but my Daddy told me that I shouldn't talk to strangers but I think you're fine so I'll answer your question," she paused as if thinking if she'll really answer my question.

I chuckled a bit and just glanced at her with a smile plastered on my face.

"I am Ian, but you can call me Yanyan. I am not a stranger now because I introduced myself to you. How 'bout you? What's your name?"

"Uhm, okay. I am Diamond Stephanie Cuaton Uy and I am with my daddy but he didn't follow so you're the one in front me," she cheerfully answered.

Cuaton.

His family is here.

I smiled a bit because of my thought. I look at the child, maybe she's his sister. But he is the youngest in the family or is she his daug--

"Diane!!!" someone shouted from a far.

Parehas naming nilingon kung sino man yung sumigaw. There he is. Waving to this pretty baby girl. I just smiled. A genuine one.

"That's my Daddy, do you want to come with me? I'll introduce you to him," she cheerfully said.

"Maybe next time," I said and smiled at her too. "Hmm, baby girl what do you want me to call you?" I asked.

"Okay, if you say so. You can call me whatever you like po hehe." She replied. She looks like him when she smiles.

"Okay then, I'll call you Diamond. You should go to your Daddy now baby he is waiting."

"Oki, see you around Tito Yan!" she said and bid a good bye.

I didn't know he has child. The only thing I know is their engagement.

I look at Diamond while she is running towards her Daddy. She hugged her daddy when she reached him at tinuro niya ako.

Sinundan naman ni Seph kung ano o sino ang itinurturo ng bata, and to his surprise it's his Yannie. He suddenly put a small smile on his lips.

"He is here, My Yannie is here."