10 Dreams Of You ¬ Larry

Video Diary - 10/24/14

I woke up with a sad feeling in my heart, but hey, what's new? That's the way I always wake up these days. I sigh and take a look at my surroundings, and I see Harry's journal sitting on my desk.

"I don't think I have the strength to read about all of your pain and suffering yet..." I say aloud as if I were talking to Harry. I close my eyes then, trying to block the slight tears that were in my eyes.

After sitting in my bed for minutes, I hear Niall call out to me.

"Louis, we made breakfast!" Niall shouts from downstairs. I groan.

Instead of shouting back that I didn't want to eat, I got out of my bed and walked downstairs anyway. Once I made my way into the kitchen, all of the lads were already seated down at the table.

"Hey, where's Harry? Why didn't you guys fix a plate of breakfast for him?!" I shouted. The boys flinched at my sudden outburst, and they all shared sad looks with each other.

Then it hit me.

"Damn..." I mumbled, covering a hand over my face.

"Here I go again thinking that Harry's still here," I laugh dryly, secretly on the verge of sobbing. "Damn me!!" I shouted, slamming my fist on the table as I cried loudly. The lads then jumped up from their seats.

"Quick!" Niall shouted. "Grab him!"

I wanted to desperately hit something, so I jerked my fist forward as I sobbed. I felt a strong hand catch my small fist, and the next thing I knew I was being picked up. My eyes were too blurred with tears for me to even acknowledge which of these fuckers picked me up. I felt a hot trail of tears roll down my cheeks as I was being carried upstairs.

"Put me the fuck down, dammit!!" I yelled, hitting whichever lad was carrying me. I think it was Liam.

"Louis...calm dow-"

"Just shut the hell up, Liam!" I chocked out, still crying violently. I felt Liam tense at my words before he dropped me down onto my bed.

I let out a piercing scream and started pulling on my hair as I sobbed.

"Why'd you throw me down?!" I screamed at Liam, and I began to hyperventilate. Shaking furiously, I felt as if I would explode in a massive puddle of tears.

Liam, Niall, and Zayn looked genuinely afraid of me, and that made things even worse.

Mornings are always the worse...

-

After an extremely quiet and awkward dinner, I decided to take a nice hot bath to ease some stress.

"Pft...can you believe it, Harry?" I laughed out, splashing the water as I did so. "Zayn says he can't handle it anymore! He doesn't want to be around me because I could hurt him or something..."

"That's complete bullshit, Harry!" I shouted, slapping both of my hands on the tiled wall. I began taking deep, slow breaths.

"...It's okay, Louis..." I heard Harry's voice say to me. "Just get some rest... You could use some..."

"You're right, Harry," I sigh, taking my hands off the wall. "I do need some rest."

-

The next day I wake up, and I'm eager to do another video diary.

10/24/14

"Remember that dream I had where I proposed to you, Harry?" I asked. "Well...I just so happened to have a dream of our wedding..."

I couldn't help the smile that was on my face one bit.

Dream 4

"I do." I said, staring deep into your eyes.

"I do." You said moments after the priest spoke. I grinned.

"You may now kiss." the priest says, stepping aside to give us room.

We leaned close to each other, and our lips eagerly pressed together. Everyone around us errupted into cheers as we kissed, and you held your arms around me tightly. We pulled away from one another, and I could see this gleam in your eyes. Everything was beautiful.

The scenery was white and silver. Your suit was white with a black bowtie. You looked just the way I imagine an angel would look. My suit was opposite of yours. Black suit, white tie...

I didn't look near as good as you did. You're perfect Harry.

"...Louis, after the wedding, I want tonight to be just you and me..." You whispered, pulling me as close as possible. My breathing grew uneven, and I was overly excited.

I stare dead into the camera.

"We never had the chance to make love..." I laugh, trying to hide my cry.

"If I do end up having a dream about that," I paused, looking away from the camera with a blush. "I won't make a video diary for that one..."

"...It would be really awkward to-yeah..." I brushed the hair out of my face, wiped the tears out of my eyes, and reached for the power button on the camera.