Crazy Over Jisoo

The First Time

Lisa

Around 2 in the morning, it's just Jisoo and I, still awake in her room. After Chae left, we decided to lay down and cuddle. She had her head and shoulders against the wall, while I had my head on her left bicep. My fingers were intertwined with her left hand that was resting on my collar bone.

She put on a soft, love-themed playlist on her phone and it played on a small speaker. For a few songs, there was no talking. We just listened to the music and felt each other's presence.  It's the sweetest moment to date.

I lift up my right hand and graze her jaw, with the lightest touch.

"This is so much, isn't it?" She asks.

"Somehow, it just feels right. Like, I'm comfortable. Are you?" I tilt my head up to look at her.

"I didn't think I would be this relaxed. I didn't know I could trust somebody this much. Or care this much. All of this is easy, because it's you," she leans her head down and bumps into mine.

"I know I'm not the best at hiding things, but even I've seen you show me signs that meant so much more than being friends or sisters. Remember in the beginning debut years, though? You didn't want anything like this!"

"Yeah, and you turned your signals to Rose and Jennie. In the beginning, I didn't know what to think of myself. I thought it was wrong of me."

"I never liked them like the way I like you. You were always another level to me. Rose and Jennie are truly my close friends, and sisters. But I wanted to love you."

"What can I say? You grew onto me, too," We share a laugh, reminiscing our younger years.

"I've been meaning to bring something up. It's about Jennie. Earlier today, she told me she knows about us. But I didn't say anything to her." I take a gulp, unsure of Jisoo's reaction.

"Jennie's smart, but I know she won't betray us. It's going to be hard to hide this from the girls, Lisa. That's just reality."

"So are we supposed to tell Chaeyoung?"

"Not if she doesn't ask. That's how I've gone about myself these past few years."

"Okay..." I turn my body where I'm now facing her, she's still looking down at me. "What happens if management finds out? I'm scared of thinking that it might not be the four of us if they knew that half of us are gay."

"I thought about this too, Lisa. Not a day goes by without having that thought. But you know me, I've never been the one to be told what to do. At least, not when it comes to the person I decide to be with. That's why we do our best to keep this between you and I."

Jisoo has the best way with words and encouragement. On camera, she always digs at me with small jokes at my expense. I don't take those personal, because when we're off camera, it's like this. Looking back at it now, she was just trying to protect herself. Deep down, I was too, when it came down to showing the girls affection. Everyone had their own slice of me, but this cake only belonged to Jisoo!

"Can I kiss you?" I ask, in my best aegyo voice. I know she hates it when I act like a baby!

"Hm, maybe or maybe not!"

"Wah, hard to get, huh?!" With that, I sit up to crawl and straddle my legs onto her hips. Her face looks so shocked!

"You made me do it, Kim Jisoo," I'm trying so hard to be sexy, but I can't stop myself from laughing at how ridiculous we're being.

She squeals from under me, and it makes me giggle. I hold both of her wrists down, above her head, and against the wall. We stop to catch our breaths. Locking onto her eyes, she seems so sure. I see her bite her bottom lip, and that sends goosebumps all over. Ugh, so sexy!!!