25-40 % is the minority of the population who are introverted. Because of this minority, it's less understood and less accepted. That's why it's so hard to be one. I struggle with this a lot because most people are ambivert or extrovert and because it's the majority, people kinda see it as the norm. Which automatically means you're abnormal and sometimes I do feel I don't fit in. Being an introvert is so misunderstood too. A lot and I mean a lot of people don't know what it means to be one and just think it's shyness. I'm not shy, but I'm an introvert.
So basically what it broadly means is that being around people cost me a lot of energy. While extroverted people receive energy from social contact. I need my time alone to recharge from all the impressions I had that day. When I say this to other people most people say to me: "Oh but I also don't mind being on my own". That's not the point. It's not about don't minding it, it's about needing it. Like really need it or otherwise, you will be drowning in exhaustion.
Because it costs energy to be social, we intend to avoid it. That's why everyone thinks we are shy. Because we don't seek social contact. Which by the way doesn't mean we don't want any social contact. Most introverts hate small talk because why waste energy on talking about nothing? It doesn't seem worth it and that's why we hold back. That is seen as anti-social which is not desired because it's not the norm. This happens especially with strangers because having small talk with people you probably will never see again just seems a waste of time and energy. But I don't see myself as anti-social, ask me about my passions and dreams and I could talk about it for hours same goes for listening to others about their passions and dreams. Because we are seen as "anti-social and shy" most of us have social anxiety. We feel the pressure to do the desired small talks because that's again what's "normal". Having that pressure makes us even want to do it less because what if you do it wrong? Or what if they don't like you?
What I think is the most difficult is that a lot of people don't understand me. They don't understand that I don't want to hang out because I was already planning to chill on my own. Or because I already had a busy day. They don't understand that writing a whole novel takes less energy than being at a family gathering. What's also misunderstood is that people think we don't like to be around people and to be social. That's not true we can love at much as everyone does. It just takes some time to recover from it. I made this example to my boyfriend: if you like to play sports it's exhausting while doing it. Still, you're going to do it again because you love it. But you can't keep it up all the time because at one point your battery is empty. That's exactly how we work in social situations.
There's a lot of cons simply because it's misunderstood and not the norm, but we have also some nice benefits. Most of us are very good listeners and observant. I probably know a lot more about people around me than most people do because I notice things sooner. We make very good friends because we are pretty picky about choosing our friends. Just because we don't want to waste time. We rather have some very close friends where we can put all our energy in than a lot of friends where the energy is divided. That's what makes us loyal. This is also a very good base for romantic relationships. We are good at networking even if we hate it. Because when networking we talk to fewer people than an extrovert would but we go deeper in the conversations which has more benefits than talking to as many people as possible. We are also known for being creative and thinking outside the box. We are spending a lot of time on our own which is a lot of time to think about a million ideas.
So even though I'm misunderstood a lot I'm proud to be who I am. Yes I may hate to call people because that's the worst thing ever, and yes I seem shy sometimes even though I'm not, and yes I don't want to meet up because I just want to be alone. But I'm loyal, creative, observant, and a great listener and if you know me I'd go through fire and water for you. So if you're an extrovert or ambivert, I hope I made you understand us better and let us be alone from time to time. And if you're an introvert I want you to know that you're not alone and you have wonderful traits even if you sometimes have to work a bit harder socially wise.
Disclaimer: I'm not an expert, the things I'm saying are from my experiences and experiences from other introverts I met. All introverts and extroverts have exceptions. Like introverts who aren't creative at all and extravert being very loyal en good listeners. It was just about which traits introverts usually have.
