his sapphire • anthony bridgerton

thirty • i'll never let you go

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"I remember tears streaming down your face when I said I'll never let you go."
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Grosvenor Square, February 17, 1814
Eight Months

As Nola became closer to what she expected to be the estimated day her child would come, she had been more prone to sleep. Sleeping whenever should could, Anthony finally had the time to go work in his office, since he had turned their bedroom into his temporary work space for the last month.

Being a family man, Anthony was as anxious as Nola to finally hold her child. He had decided, respectfully, to denounce protocol for men in the birthing room, knowing the second he heard her scream, he would dash in anyways. No one argued, knowing Anthony's mind could never be changed once he's decided for himself.

Nola never wanted to argue about it in the first place, he was the only person with the ability to comfort her... she needed him there.

Who would she be to deny the father of her child the beauty of the babies arrival into the world, especially one who already adored their child.

Nola would often hear Anthony speaking aloud to himself across the hall, within the nursery. He had been rearranging the books on the shelves to make it easier for his wife to find them- which she greatly appreciated.

Anthony had refused to make any sexual contact with his wife since the night at the opera house, no matter how much he longed for it. He hated rejecting her when she would ask him, and no matter how tempted, he informed her it was not safe for her healing rib cage, not wanting to be the cause of it becoming worse.

It was painful, frankly. All she did was stare at the ceiling till sleep overcame her.

Sloan had visited the previous week with Oliver. Their son, Matthias Harrison, was a gem. He had her sisters beautiful brown complexion, and Oliver's dashing smile. It melted her heart... truly.

Daphne had over almost every day, aiding her sister-in-law with anything she needed done. She had assisted her in changing into a different set of pajamas, brushing, and managing her curls... Daphne was truly heaven sent.

Simon had not been able to see Nola. Seeing her in pain would only trigger the way she had arrived on his fathers doorsteps as a child. A memory he wished he could hide in his mind forever, but you could not erase the past.

Nola and Simon had been handed the short end of the stick when it came to parental figures, even with Lady Addington, who still rejected Anthony as her son-in-law, despite the constant fight Nola put up, until eventually deciding she did not wish to see Ginevra till she learned to accept her husband, and Ginevra had not returned since, with the hard head she had, who knew when she would.

Nola awoke in the middle of the night, finding Anthony's bedside empty. Releasing a sigh, she attempted to stand for the first time in the past month. Losing her balance, she pulled herself up by the end table, and used the railing to step down the stairs. Once she finally got the hang of it, she stood outside her husbands door, looking in.

His head rested on his hand, but his eyes were both closed- he fell asleep at his desk. A smile grew on Nola's lips, as she walked to him. Gently pressing her mouth to his cheek, making him stir. "Nola?" He questioned, wondering why she was awake.

"Come to bed, Anthony..." she begged, silently, into his ear, knowing it drove him crazy.

"Nola, I can not. I need to finish these documents for Lo- oh." He moaned as she placed her hand on his crotch. "Nola... sweetheart..." he seethed, leaning into her shoulder. "We mustn't... it's not safe for you." He attempted to reason as she unbuttoned his trousers, sticking her hand in his pants. "Ooh!" He groaned, grabbing her wrist as her hand groped his manhood.

"Please, Milord... let me pleasure you..." he looked to her, looking for any sign of discouragement, before hastily nodding, and sliding his pants down his legs. His shaft remained in Nola's grasp as she began running her hand up and down, seeing his eyes roll back.

"Just like that..." he let out, spreading his legs a little wider to let her kneel comfortably between them. "God, Nola..." he begged through gritted teeth.

"Please, Anthony..." she begged, stopping her movements and giving him her best pair of puppy dog eyes.

He tried to ignore her, "No." he rejected, looking away from her. "I will not allow myself to hurt you again."

She stood up from her spot on the floor, hiking the bottom of her slip, revealing the lack of undergarments she usually adorned. Anthony gulped, trying to refrain himself from grabbing her hips and pulling her into him. "Nola... I shouldn't." He tried to convince himself, dropping his hands from the woman's body, but she simply responded.

"But you want to."

"Of course, I want to!" He exclaimed, "but darling... you can hardly walk down the stairs by yourself right now. I will not add on to the list once again..." he placed himself back in his pants, pulling her night gown back down and leading her back up the stairs to their bedroom. "Sleep tight, my love..." he murmured, pulling the covers back over her frame, pressing his lips to her temple and returned downstairs to his office, continuing to sign and write till he felt he could no longer move his hands.