Everything or Nothing
CatacylsmicEvents
Chapter 10: Heartache
Notes:
you can find me on twitter on @cataclysmiceve1!
TW // Chronic Illness
On the last day of exams, Dazai feels cold.
Probably because he should have worn a heavier jacket. That's definitely why. It's snowing, for Christ's sake. But he doesn't really care. He's standing on the steps of the biology department building, trying to remember what his plans were for the rest of the day. Probably going to a bar.
This doesn't feel like jealousy.
Watching them leaning against one of the trees on the Quad, Chuuya smiling each time his boyfriend steals a kiss from him, his face red from the cold, and maybe something more—it's painful.
Dazai could deal with it, if it was some sleaze that was going to end up hurting him—someone he could go and shove away, telling Chuuya that this was for his own good, not self-serving—but he can't do that with this guy. Not someone who makes Chuuya smile like that.
And when he goes out to night, he'll tell himself it's just a drink to get the edge off after the stress of finals. Not because he'll be looking to get into a different redhead's bed, trying to get over it.
To get over this.
"Alright, that's it," he nearly jumps out of his skin at the voice next to him, "you look like you're about to start singing 'On My Own' from Les Miserables, and I just can't handle that right now," Yuan punches his arm a little harder than she needs to, making the brunette wince and glare.
He doesn't get the accusation that he was expecting, like 'Why the hell are you mooning over your roommate? He has a boyfriend.' Or 'Are you stupid? if you like him so much, ask him out.'
"Dazai-kun," Yuan takes hold of his sleeve, tugging it gently, and when Dazai looks at her he leans away, startled, "Are you okay?"
And it sounds so pathetic. Pitiful, really.
But no one has ever asked Dazai that before—except for Chuuya, anyway.
"...I'm fine," he answers slowly, trying to tug out of her grip, but she holds on.
"I can tell..." her eyes drift to the side, to where Dazai has been staring and his stomach sinks at the idea of his problems being so visible. "Look, do you wanna get something to eat? We can talk about it."
"I'm not hungry."
Yuan's eye twitches slightly as she gives his arm another tug. "A drink? Boba? Karaoke? Work with me here, buddy."
Dazai makes a face, trying to think of a way to get out of this. Really, if he doesn't wanna go, he isn't going. No one has ever been able to make Dazai Osamu do something he doesn't wanna do—
"The room is all yours for the next two hours, have fun kids!"
They end up at a Karaoke bar called, 'Hungry Like the Wolf'.
Dazai is not happy about it.
"O-kay," Yuan sighs, queuing up songs as Dazai glares at his beer, "We can do this the easy way, or the hard way."
"What's the easy way?"
"You tell me what's bothering you." Yuan hums.
"And the hard way?"
“I’ll sing,” Yuan replies grimly, pulling up some 80s tunes, “and that might not sound like a threat, but believe me—you’ll regret ever being born.”
