Fragile Hearts(Saifahzon)

Truth Hurts

As usual, as soon as we reached to the canteen, me and Zen took respective trays of our lunch and sat on our seats. I drank a sip of water and instead of eating, I was playing the rice in my plate with the spoon, kind of mixing up. Phi Soda told me that phi Saifah gets better but his expression doesn't change. Cold and quiet. I don't know what to feel. I feel so bad that he's suffering like this but i also can't believe him completely. What if he's just acting? What if he's just doing all this to persuade me? I'm getting tired of this stupid dilemma.

"Zon.." Zen who's sitting beside me suddenly spoke, interrupting my train of thoughts.

"Hmm?.."

"Eat."

"What?"

"Eat your lunch."

"I will."

"Yesterday you replied me the same but ended up leaving it in the trash. Food is not free. There are many people dying in hunger just because they don't have anything to eat." I rolled my eyes and replied him with a sarcastic tone.

"Ohoo..stop lecturing me. You sound like a monk." He's just worried about me but instead of saying it out loud, he's saying it inexplicitly.

"I'm not-..huhh...if you don't eat lunch, you'll get hungry. And you'll get stomachaches. So, please eat your lunch khrub.." He said me in a teasing tone. I chuckled but my wide smile slowly fainted as someone i didn't want to see came into my sight.

A group of girls in engineering uniforms passed by our table, sitting behind us. Some days ago, our canteen was in repair so maybe today is their turn. Nearly everyone stared at a certain girl in them with mesmerized eyes but i looked at her with the sharpest glare i had. I turned my head to my plate again, trying to calm myself down. Seeing her is just making me recall all those memories back. Phi Saifah and her...at the back of the building....kissing.

I felt Zen's hand holding on mine which was clenching the spoon.

"Is that..her?" He asked in a low quiet tone as if he's scared of my sudden fuming figure or maybe he's just making sure that they don't hear him. I just nodded to his question and put a mouthful of the fried rice into my mouth. Zen, too, continued eating his lunch. They were just behind me so i can hear what they're saying. Mostly about their boyfriends and their daily life. A casual conversation. But one girl who spoke phi Saifah's name got my attention.

"Mak..you still haven't told us about Saifah. How did it go?"

"...Well..."

"You mean it went well?"

"No...it didn't."

"What?..How?'

"Ok..let me explain. When i arrived, he asked me for his books and i gave him. And-"

"You confessed him?"

"Just shut up and listen. Yes. I did confess him that i like him. But he didn't answer anything. And...i kissed him." Loud gasps can be heard. I was confused. It's not like what i've imagined.

"Oi! When did you become that brave?!"

"Shhh!"

"Sorry."

"And what happened? Did he kiss you back?" My heart skipped a beat at that question.

"No. He broke all my confidence."

"Ouh..."

"He pushed me and with his awe struck face, he said...he has someone. And just dashed away."

He...said?

"So you mean he denied you."

"Yes. BUT who is that girl that he chose over me? I mean...I'm Mak. The QUEEN of our faculty YET..."