Do For Love

Chapter 17

Me mommy love me, like she love her nappy head

She sang me fables, when she used to wrap me dreads

She said me look like me grandpappy, now he dead

He never met me, but he loved me, yeah he did

He was a king, before me Ma became a queen

They killed him dead, because he tried to stop the war

Me momma love me, like the song that she sings

But I think she loves me just a little bit more...

~Chance The Rapper-Zion

     

    *Autumn's prospective*

    **Jasmine's phone rings "work"**

"Baeeee! Ya phone's ringing!" Shit she can't hear me. "BAE YOUR JOB'S CALLING YOU!" Fuck it. "Hello, Mrs.Lamar phone. Autumn speaking."

    "Hello Mr.Lamar, this is Ms.Jackson at Jackson's Marriage Counseling. I'm calling to tell her that I have to change her appointment from 12pm to 2:30pm."

    "Marriage Counseling!?" The fuck she seeing a marriage counselor for? "If you don't mind me asking, Ms.Jackson is it? How long has Jasmine been seeing you."

    "About a month or so."

    "Oh wow okay well I'll let her know you called." I hung up. Woooow this bitch been seeing a marriage counselor. Like really what do she possible need counselling about? Know what ima see if she going to tell me or not. Stupid ass bitch.

    "Hey bae," she was stepping out the shower and drying off, "you okay?"

    Stupid bitch, "I'm fine." Lying ass bitch. "Your job called." Stupid lying ass bitch.

    Her face shot up and she looked as if she witnessed a murder.

    "You answer it?"

    I turned away from her. "Yeah, they wanted you to call them back. I guess it's important." I still can't believe this bitch.

   "Oh okay, I'll call them back later. Until then, "she eased her way over to me and wrapped her arms around me, "I think I want my papa."

    As bad as I wanted her, I couldn't do it because I was pissed off at her.

    "No Jas not tonight." Really never again. I didn't even want her to touch me period. I walked away to the bed. Went straight to sleep.

    *Jasmine's prospective*

    **2:30pm at Jackson's Marriage Counseling services**

    "Welcome back Mrs.Lamar. How are you?" Ms.Jackson asked me as I walked in.

    "Fine, you?"

    "Great. What do you want to talk about today?"

    "Tyrone."

    "Okay, have a seat. Let's start by telling me who Tyrone is."

    "Tyrone Willingham. An ex of mines. We use to mess around until we broke up and I left him for Autumn. A couple months ago he showed up at my job and umm he 'forced' himself on me."

    "He raped you?"

    I cleared my throat. "Yes." Her pen began to paint the vivid words onto her notepad as I carried on.

    "Mhm, how do you feel about it or that or however you want me to approach it."

    Her pen ready I responded. "Actually I haven't came like that in years. No I didn't like the fact that I was being raped or the fact that it was him..."

    She interrupt me. "Then what was it?"

    "I...I don't know." I sighed. "Maybe the fact that I came like I haven't in a long time."

    "Do you crave more?"

    "Every night. Not Tyrone but to cum and have sex."

    "When was the last time you and your husband had sex?"

    "Its been a while. I tried last night but he said not tonight and went to bed. I tried again but he just rolled over. So I masturbated."

    "Mhm," her pen was writing on her pad again. "I would suggest to keep trying and when it finally does happen fuck him like haven't in years. Try new things and be more open with him. Like does he know about us? About you coming here? About me touching you?"

    "No, and I feel so damn ashamed for hiding shit from him. This isn't me. I will tell him...eventually." I sighed and gathered my things. "Speaking of him, it's about time for me to get home to my husband."

    "Okay. I'll be in touch. Remember what I said Mrs.Lamar. Drive safely."   

     A 2:30 appointment that was only suppose to be an hour turned into about 3 and a half hours talking about my craving for sex with my husband and my ex raping me in my office.