100 Days DISCONTINUED

Teaser

"Park Seonghwa." 

"Yes?" I perked up when the nurse called my name. She waved over to the dark haired boy (me) and motioned for me to enter the office. I peeked in through the doorway into the familiar room.

The hospital. I had been spending a lot of time there lately, too much time. It made me anxious but usually I just pushed that stress out of the way. 

I took a seat on the check up table, my legs finally long enough to touch the bright tiled floor illuminated by the fluorescent light hanging from the ceiling. A clock ticked on the wall, the hand swinging side to side. 

As I waited for the doctor to come in, I played with my bracelet. It was a bad habit of mine. Whenever I felt tensed or worried I just fiddle with the charms until I relax. 

The charms represent me and my seven best friends. One charm for each of us. Mine is an a dragon, Yunho's is a golden retriever, San's is a mountain-

Immediately I fold my hands on my lap as my doctor opens the door, clipboard in hand. "Good morning." He huffs, taking a seat in his chair across from me.

"Hello." I nod in return willing my hands not to seek comfort in fidgeting with my bracelet. I want to look mature and sensible in such a serious setting. 

The doctor flips through the pages on his clipboard as his glasses slide down his nose. Awkwardly I keep my mouth shut, not wanting to make conversation when he looks so conflicted. Suddenly he clears his throat and turns to me.

"Seonghwa?"

"Yes?" I say, brushing a stray lock of hair out of my eyes.

He sighed deeply, my anxiety beginning to stir in my stomach. Or that could have been another of my coughing fits.

"What?" I ask urgently, distress swimming within me. When doctors sighed the way mine just had the news was never good.

He glanced up at me, his eyes filled with what looked like disappointment. What had I possibly done, I wondered. "Seonghwa, I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news but unfortunately we got some results back and you have a limited time to live."

My heart lurched in my chest and dropped to the floor. All the memories of my coughing fits flooded my brain at an intense speed. My vision blurred with images of me dying in  multiple situations, from alone in my stark apartment to in the midst of one hang out with my friends. I felt tears well in my eyes as I imagine their horrified faces.

"No..." I choke out weakly, throat suddenly hoarse. "No this can't be."

The doctor nodded solemnly, looking up at me. "Unfortunately it's true. You have about one hundred days to live-"

"One hundred days?!" I shout frantically, very uncharacteristic for me. "Only a hundred days? What do you mean? No I haven't gotten everything I've wanted to do done yet." At this point I had tears streaming down my face but I didn't care. "I never traveled to another country, I've never gotten a job I loved, I never enjoyed waking up in the mornings. It can't be over, I have to live."

My doctor shook his head, clearly disappointed by the news too. He had treated me since I was 16. I wiped my sleeve across my face as my nose began running. I didn't care that I was breaking down in a doctors office. I had to cry. 

"Mr Park, Seonghwa, it's alright." He pat me on the back as I let out another sob.

I knew the truth though. It's not alright, it will never be. I'm going to die too soon. A few years ago I wouldn't have minded this news, I would have been pretty pleased knowing I would have been granted a release from this cruel world.

But then I met him. 

And I can't die. I can't die.

"I can't I can't I can't...." I repeated for at least another fifteen minutes as Dr. Xu pat my back. 

"I can't I can't I can't...." 

I will stay alive for you, Kim Hongjoong.