Minutes Before Midnight

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#MBM00

"I think we have time for one more question for Ms Cielo Legaspi. Any takers?" The host of my book signing asked the crowd.

Today's the last day of my meet and greet in the US. I was invited to a writers' conference in New York so I was able to meet my readers who have been following my book.

After years of struggling to put my thoughts coherently into paper, I guess I could say I made it.

Hindi madaling maabot ang mga pangarap. I had gone through a zigzagged journey to get to where I am today and it was not easy. Libo-libong buhok rin ang nalagas sa akin 'no!

At the onset of my writing career, I sought validation from people's praises and allowed criticism to swallow my confidence.

Sigura nga mahirap kapag masyado mong pine-pressure ang sarili mo. In my case, nobody really expected me to focus on writing as livelihood. Akala ng marami'y mag-aabogasya ako. I loved writing since I was young but everyone else's expectations of me were different.

But then again, life is full of surprises and here I am.

"Yes, I see a young lady in a red sweatshirt raising her hand."

Binaling ko ang aking mga mata sa babaeng mukhang excited magtanong sa akin.

Lumapit ang isang miyembro ng events team sa kaniya para ibigay ang mikropono.

"Hi, I'm Angela and I love your books!" She gushed as soon as she got hold of the microphone. "It was not really mentioned in any of your interviews but I know for sure most of your readers related and aspired to be like Vida who learned to be comfortable in her own skin. By any chance, does she end up with somebody? At least in your imagination? If so, is it with one of the characters in Minutes Before Midnight?"

Napatigil ako sa tanong niya at bahagyang yumuko.

I moved my body forward to reach the microphone in front of me.

"Thanks for coming here, Angela," I said while smiling at her. "The ending highlights how Vida has finally accepted and taken charge of herself. She can be anything. She can do anything — and that's my main takeaway. Honestly speaking, I also did not know how to end it."

I chuckled at my last sentence. Totoo naman kasi. Suminghap ang iba sa kanila. Groundbreaking revelation ba 'to? Mukhang hindi naman masyado.

"I am a sucker for fulfilling happy endings. I mean, who doesn't want one, right? But I am also realistic. I could not bring myself to give an ending to a story that I have a lot of hopes for."

What kind of an ending do I want Vida to have anyway? Needless to say, I wanted her to reach her dreams. I wanted her to learn how to love herself and not let other people dictate who she is.

Do I wish for her to be with somebody? Yes, hopefully.

But of course, I did not share my last thought. During my course of writing this book, I thought of giving Vida the kind of love she deserves.

From who exactly?

Why did I even bother asking when the first person who came to mind was him?

Naalala ko na naman siya. Not that I am pining for him after all these years but I admit that he had a great impact in my life. He is one of the reasons why I persevered.

I was not really sure where we stood at that time but we both knew it was real. However, the universe has its own way of deciding whether two people are meant to be together.

And I guess us is not part of the deal.

"I wish I could give you a satisfying response but just like Vida and everyone else, we don't always know the answers to our questions. Perhaps let's settle with a 'maybe'?"

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Would love to hear your thoughts (kahit violent reactions lol), so comments or tweets (#MBMPrologue) are much appreciated! :)