N.O.

Chapter Twelve

-Luna-

July 27, 2020 (Present Time)

It's been exactly a year since the night of the party. To this day I continue to have nightmares about what happened on July 27, 2019. I'm not sure if they will ever go away. It's okay though. Throughout these 365 days, I have been able to grow as a person. I know and understand my worth now. I know what it means to say yes and what it means to say no. There is a drastic difference in those two words. When you say yes, you should know if you really want it, and if you're really ready for it. Don't say yes because you are pressured into it by someone else or because you are heavily intoxicated like me.

A year after the incident, I decided to write about my experience as a way for me to move on with my life and continue to grow as someone who has control of their own life path. Writing has always been therapeutic for me, it's a way for me to let out how I feel without someone interrupting me or having something to say right off the bat. I let a small range of people read what I write, that just means Carlos and Indiana. Maybe someday I will let Charlie read this, but for now I will keep it to a minimum until I am ready. For now, I have chosen to minor in Creative Writing while I major in Sociology at William & Mary. I chose to major in Sociology because it can lead me toward a career path in Law.

After everything that happened with Carlos, I don't want that to happen to anyone else ever again. They classified him due to his race and appearance which is not okay. He's Mexican so it automatically made him be looked at negatively, like he was as bad as being a part of a Gang or Mafia. Since he is tall and built it means that he is a threat, which was the main reason he was charged with a misdemeanor statutory rape. The jury believed Carlos threatened Brynlee into saying she lied about the whole situation, even though she did lie about the entire thing. Carlos even had to register as a sex offender which ruined his life. It's a truly messed up system.

After Carlos' trial, I did attempt to take Cole to court for actually raping me. It fell through. There was insufficient evidence to convict him of statutory rape. Cole didn't even have to register as a sex offender. My case didn't even make it to a jury trial. There was also the fact that I was Carlos' sister and they assumed I was doing it out of revenge so it was partially my fault. I guess I should have told my story sooner. Cole is a wealthy white male, which is the case in most rape cases. Most of the time white men receive white priviledge and are set free even if they did rape the girl, because the justice system thinks they have potential to change. Guys like Carlos who are not wealthy, not privileged, and are colored, seem to always be accused of the crime and face consequences. It's not fair. It's also girls like Brynlee who mess with the system and cause people to believe the women less. It is not fair for Carlos. A girl lied about him raping her and it cost him his entire future. He lost his football scholarships, then he lost his academic scholarships so he could not afford USC anymore. Then before he could try to find a way to pay, USC asked him politely to leave because they did not want a sex offender on campus. It sucked, it really did. It was hard for me to see him go through that.

Carlos now lives with Charlie in Charlie's apartment ever since mom and dad threw him out for being gay. Carlos even managed to get a job at a small diner, he may not get paid much, but it's the best he can do for now. I want to help him as much as I can, once I am able to. My parents refused to pay for my college after they found out about Cole, so I applied for many different scholarships as well as financial aid. William & Mary helped a lot. They offered me a little bit more than half off of the tuition, and with the many different scholarships I received, the cost went down to $10,000. I applied for some loans, I kept it to a minimum and even have a summer job.

Cole took a year of my life away. He took away my power. He took away my strength. His sister took away my brother's future. His family ruined mine. I won't give anyone else that opportunity. I know how to take care of myself and how to keep myself up when I feel like I'm falling. Being raped wasn't necessarily the end for me, it just was a part of my life I have to continue to overcome. Do I wish and pray it never happened? Absolutely. Can I take back that night? I wish. I have to keep moving forward and moving on with my life if I want to be happy. So that's what I'm doing. What Cole did to me was never okay. It should never be okay for anyone to do. Because N.O. means N.O.