The Rich Life

32

AMARA POV

I've spent my entire life pleasing everyone. My parents, my brothers, my religion and culture, my teachers, my employers, Adam, Tony and whoever else can be included in this damn list. Not anymore. After Karamat was dumped, I decided to please myself. 

Dad was opening a new construction branch in South Korea. And he wanted me to lead the team. I didn't have to do it, but I wanted to do it. I would spend 6 months abroad in Seoul. Perfect timing because the election will take place two weeks after I get back. 

There were too many memories everywhere I go. I needed to get out. A fresh start. The ground feels like its swallowing me up and I'm holding on to something that's breaking me. You might call it running away from my problems. I call it a mental health break. I can put it under the guise of diplomacy work. It's not lying. It's just not the full truth. 

I refuse to be a love-addicted fool like Sara said. I've lost myself and I don't know how to find it. So I'm hoping being alone will change that. I needed to end this impossible love. I needed to kill off Amara Khan's love. 

That included using retail therapy to solve all of my problems I had inside of me. Every day I spent hundreds of pounds for the most pointless things ever and re-designing the house. It's not like I couldn't afford it. But everyone was interested so I posted pictures. 

I tried to pretend like I didn't hear about Madilyn and Adam's engagement breakup. Madilyn had re-located to California. No one knew why they broke up. And I didn't ask him why. We went for runs in silence. We did everything in silence, but together now. Somehow, it felt wrong when there were silences between me and Karamat. The silences between me and Adam felt natural like it brought us together. Pfft. All for refusing to be in love with him. 

He is really worth the pain. What's a bit of love without pain?

The little voice of contradiction was, well, contradicting what my head was thinking. I don't want to get hurt again. I feel like a scared little girl running across a knife blade, my body bleeding. Feeling like glass, like if you hold me too hard, I'll smash into a billion pieces. I've never felt this way before therefore I didn't know how to deal with it. 

We're going to take this way too far again and it will hurt more again

There. I was right. The voice of contradiction shut up and I concentrated on my running. 

"How's the house going?" Adam said, slowing down slightly. 

"Good. I thought of bringing a minimalist theme. There's only two of us. I'm currently designing the nursery for my nieces and nephews," I replied back, matching his pace. 

"Bartholomew?"

He came home last week, slightly traumatised and never leaving my side and afraid to go near anyone else. He's starting to sleep with me in my duvet.

"No long-term damage," I passed some benches, speeding up slightly, "How's Zajmi Industries?"

"I've stopped it from drowning. It's expanding again and the London HQ is almost built,"

I knew people and tabloids were talking about us being together, making rumours up. Let them talk. Nothing was going on between us. We were good friends. I still haven't talked about moving to South Korea with Adam yet. I'll take the coward way out and tell him. When I'm on the aeroplane.

"Hey Adam," I collapsed on the bench, huffing and puffing, "Wanna stop for a second,"

"You're so lazy Amara," He replied, stopping. 

"And so are you. I've been running faster than you. And longer than you," I retorted, clutching my stomach.