the insane shit that happens to me lmao

busssssss

okok so one time last year, I got on the bus to go to school and sat in the back two seats behind this kid (who is important to the story, I think his name is blake), and a couple stops later he lays down in his seat and puts his legs up on the two seats in front of him and starts doing the whole "AJKSHFKJHSF IM GIVING BIRTH" thing. 

 some kids are going along with it, and one kid even pretended to deliver the baby (it was a boy, and the kid who "gave birth" to it screamed and said "NO I DONT WANT A BOY, PUT IT BACK,"). 

now, I took a pic of this while it was happening cause I thought it was funny (this is important). skip to the end of the day, I get on the bus to go home, sitting in almost the same seat as the morning, and a kid I knew from elementary school (we were still acquaintances for some reason) sat behind me, 

so I go "hey Mateo, you remember what happened this morning? well I took a picture of it," and he goes "no way, really? lemme see!" so I show him and he tells this girl behind him and she goes, "OH MY GOD, *DEADNAME* HAS A CRUSH ON BLAKE," which wasn't fucking true, I despised that kid cause he was all but nice, really. 

so now everyone is saying "YOU LIKE BLAKE HOLY SHIT," and I'm about to start crying cause I didn't know what to do and my best friend at the time, Paige (who's also a ginger lmao), tries to give me her hardcover math textbook to hit the damn kids, but I didn't hit them as I didn't want to get in trouble. 

so next thing I knew the blake kid starts walking towards the bus and they're like "OH MY GOD *DEADNAME* YOUR BOYFRIEND IS COMING," and they started CHANTING MY GOD DAMN DEADNAME. so I started to cry, finally, and Paige comes over in my seat to try and calm me down cause who the hell wants the see their best friend cry? 

so the kid comes on the bus to the back and is like "why is she crying? what the hell did you do??" so I'm not really crying much but I was really shaky cause nothing like this has ever fucking happened to me before cause I'm so used to being a background character that no one really notices. 

and the kids try to justify themselves to blake by saying "well....well she tried to hit us!" and so blake tries to scold a shaken-up me for attempting to hit them, but he sits down two seats behind me or so. 

BUT WAIT THATS NOT ALL, FOLKS, THE BUS DRIVER, MISS JESSICA STOPS THE BUS AFTER WE LEAVE THE SCHOOL TO COME BACK AND SEE WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED, AND WHEN THE KIDS TRIED TO JUSTIFY THEMSELVES WITH HER WITH THE SAME EXCUSE "well she tried to hit us!! we aren't the bad guys here!"

 THE QUEEN MISS JESSICA IS SAID TO ME, "next time they do that, I'm giving you permission to hit them," AND THEN WENT BACK TO DRIVING THE BUS. and that's the story of why I never rode the bus in the morning anymore lmao. ALSO ONE OF MY OTHER FRIENDS (who I called my brother at the time) DIDN'T EVEN HELP ME TRY TO STOP THOSE EVIL FUCKING CHILDREN.