Delilah and Collete

chapter five : unsettling avoidance

Collete 

my trembling hands rubbed my blotchy face in desperation , saturated in tears as i paced around my room , clutching the note from Delilah from that night in the attic . I hadn't seen her for days now but i dreaded asking if she had left because i didn't want to face the likley verdict . i wiped away my tears and hurried down the marble staircase , i tried to tell myself i was walking to keep myself busy but i knew i was looking for Delilah . Across the ballroom the wide doors were open , accompanied by a hauntingly familiar silhouette , delilah stood there carrying a case . But in from of her was a carrige . Fierce adrenaline built up inside me as i Ran rapidly towards the ballroom doors , As i got there Delilah stepped further away from me , before stepping into the carriage . still running , my breathless gasps echoed through cold crisp air as i reached the doors , The carrige rode out of the gates , delilah inside . There was no point chasing now i stormed back across the ballroom and it to my fathers study . He gave me a look of disapproval at my breathlessness and untamed hair . "delilah" i stated with frustration , barley containing my restlessness . "she asked to leave for a few days , i accepted" My fathers words suddenly shattered me into a million pieces . without giving him a reply i left and restlessly paced around the cold grounds , i could try and find out when she would be back . But what was the point , would she come back at all ?  i had pushed her away and now i had to face the consequences . The next three days i spent doing nothing but thinking , the day blended into restless sleepless evenings .

i watched from my window as a carrige drew up to the gates and for a moment i was hopeful , i sighed as william stepped out . After enduring a tretrious  conversation between william and my father about wedding arguments .  where both men ignored any suggestion i tried to put forward   , william and I walked across the grounds that fell under a golden blanket of early autumn light . He sat next to me on the bench ,  tired trees above us and crumpled leave below our feet "i was thinking about possible names for our first born child" he said confidently breaking the  silence ."where not even married yet" i stated blankly . 

"thats insignificant to my point what I'm saying is-" he argued 

"your point itself is insignificant i don't want childr- " his voice started to painfully cut into mine "you'll change your mind don't be ridiculous-" 

"if i say something I'm always sure of it William" i interrupted him again , louder and clearer this time eager to prove a point . This had failed to silence his arrogance and we continued to childishly quarrel "what i was saying it that when we do have children-"

"shhh" i interrupted , actually silencing him this time . I had accepted i would have to listen to his incorrect opinions now but something more important captured my attention "will you excuse me" i stated , getting up before waiting for an answer . i quickly headed towards the carriage that had stopped infant of the gates , lively curls and glowing skin merged . Delilah . I rushed towards her as she headed towards the doors of the house  Rolling me eyes and i realised william was following behind me , confused . Delilah shot her head to the side as she met me with a cold , unwelcoming glare . I ran towards her . As i finally caught up to Delilah and stopped at the doors ,while she headed across the ballroom and up the marble stairs , "what are you doing"He  asked breathlessly , standing behind me . "you should go now" i replied . I didn't wait for him to reply , i paced after Delilah and after a few moments she stopped on the marble staircase . our eyes met as she turned . I didn't know how to feel . "i thought you were gone" i tried to maintain a calm tone as i spoke . "well, I'm here " she said blankly , i noticed that her eyes were tired, they had lost there usual shimmer . i took her hand gently , at first she was hesitant to look at me but she slowly bought her gaze up to mine my face moved closer to hers but she moved back "you confuse me collete" she said as she broke our eye contact and continued up the stair case leaving me speechless but i didn't want to give up now. "if you took the time to try and understand us,  I'm sure i'd make sense to you" i replied . Delilah ignored me and started to continue up the stairs . "i didn't have a choice , delilah . i had to say yes to william" anxiety filled my voice and this made her turn around . "what ?" she asked . i moved slightly closer to her "My father said if i didnt say yes then ,... then he would send you away" i sat down on a wide marble step and sighed , gesturing with my eyes for Delilah to sit downiest to me . Reluctantly , she sat close to me , with her hand resting on my arm . "you did that for me collete ?" she asked , 

"i suppose so"  i blushed slightly  and then realised that i was supposed to be angry but i couldn't contain my sadness and a tear rolled down my cheek , i never cried in front of anyone but Delilah was the exception "i didn't want to tell you and i-" sobs broke my speech but my words flowed like river as delilah placed her hand on the side of my face ."i didnt know what to do and the i was scared to explain that i had committed to you and it seemed like i was being awful and I'm sorry , and then you went away and i thought id ruined everything and i felt so bad i missed you i-" i rambled my feelings being spoken into existence too quickly for me to process i only stopped my talent when i noticed the sharp pain in Delilahs deep brown eyes. "you didn't send me away Collete , I was at Kitty's funeral . i suddenly felt a pang of guilt consume me "i didn't really think of myself as selfish but Even this i managed to make about me , you don't deserve me delilah" i was ready to get up and leave as i realised how insufferabley unkind i was but Delilah gently tugged on my arm and i reluctantly sat back down ."don't apologise i felt terrible that i didn't give you time to explain if i had known this was the case i would be ready to get you out of this mess straight away , you can't be forced into marriage and you won't be" she said , angry now , but not at me .  "theres nothing we can do now delilah , I'm engaged , we have no power , well , i have no power" i sighed .

"you've got to stop undermining yourself  Collete , i will get you out of this , and you , well,  you can be described as many things , powerful is certainly one of them" i blushed a little bit as she spoke but the dark cloud of my engagement still tormented me . "I've got a ball to get ready for sorry" i said , squeezing Delilahs hand her arm slowly wrapped round my waist and she kissed me , we took a sweet , short moment to smile into each others eyes before she spoke "i guess ill see you there then , she said and i strode up the stairs ,more  calm and content than ever.