𝐓𝐢𝐜𝐜𝐢 𝐓𝐨𝐛𝐲 𝐱 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫: 𝐄𝐲𝐞𝐬 𝐎𝐟 𝐃𝐞𝐜𝐞𝐢𝐭

A Sinner's Guide To Heaven

TW!

The grand L/N household is finally in view and Toby couldn't be more thankful, exhausted from running so much.

He bursts through the backdoor, the door she always leaves open like she's expecting his arrival during the midnight hours. He stomps up the staircase, heart skipping beats with anticipation as he throws open her bedroom door. His smile fades and his excitement diminishes when he sees her standing in the middle of her room, as beautiful as ever but looking so heartbroken. Tragic black tears stain her face and her lips tremble as she smiles brightly at him. One of her hands is behind her back.

He's stunned and everything he planned to say falls out of his head just like sand through a sieve. Y/N shakily points to the large white vanity in her room and Toby follows her directions, gaze stopping on a folded slip of paper taped onto the mirror, a heart drawn in the middle of it. Toby slowly reaches for the note, gently taking it in his hands and begins to open it.

A deafening bang sounds through the room, shaking the walls. The pop alarms Toby, wracking his body with terror, his nerves destroyed by the blaring noise. He turns around, and lays eyes on Y/N's body. She staggers and to the floor she falls, thumping hard against the wood. The blood leaks from her temple, rushing across the dark hardwood and seeps into the area rug in the centre of the room. She's dead. She can't bleed so much, so quickly and survive.

The silence inside the room is so loud. Toby approaches the corpse, looking down at the woman. Her hair is matted with blood. Her eyes are closed peacefully. Toby fights the oncoming sob, struggling to suppress it in his throat. He crouches down, putting his head between his knees and finally letting it all out. Uneven breaths fill the still air as he tries to console himself until he realizes he has no one to hide from anymore. He can cry now.

Toby doesn't like to cry. He had it reinforced in his head that crying was weak; men do not cry. He never saw his father cry, not until his last night alive. The tears shimmered in the corner of his eyes and it was a sight to see, it satisfied Toby very much.

His shoulders shake as he weeps, peeking his head up to look at his late lover only to sob harder, unable to catch his breath. He straightens up a bit, wiping his salty tear stained cheeks and dabbing underneath his nose with the back of his hand. He runs a hand through his hair and tries to piece himself together again. He crawls over to the girl, pulling her body up and rearranges their position so he is leaning his back against the side of her bed and she's resting her back against his front, head tilted back limply on his chest. He wraps his arms around her smaller body, kissing the top of her head just like she'd do to him whenever she knew he was having troubles.

This is the way she wanted to look when she died; young and beautiful. Now she'll always be remembered for her youthful glow. She never did like the idea of growing old. Especially as a teen, she had a live fast, die young mentality. The bullet was small and the blast didn't shatter the side of her skull but instead, leave one clear hole from her left temple to the right one. Her dead face is pretty. There's no more pain evident in her features.

If only he made it here a little earlier tonight. If only he treated Y/N with the tenderness she deserved, would she maybe still alive to call his. Her mind was already made up when he walked through the door and that's why she's dead in his arms. Nothing he said in that moment could've changed anything. She looked happy to know the end was near and that smile she wore said it all.

The note. He pulls it out and uncrumples it from when he jammed it into his back pocket of his black jeans after he heard the blast of the gun. Perfect cursive, in red pen, are words written just for him. Towards the top of the letter, her handwriting is precise, sloping in fancy loops and inclining into sloppy scratches on the cheap stationary. It's barely legible by the time he's reached the bottom.