Loving The Lost

Chapter 13

Jay's POV:

He laughed!! He actually laughed! Ive never heard him laugh before but fuck me if I say it didn't make my heart beat twice as hard and my chest to fill with delight. Fuck, I'm even in love with his laugh!

His eyes gleamed up as he gazed up at me through his hair that hung loosely and freely over his face. He only reaches just below my shoulders, but his hight fit him perfectly, just like the weak smile he offered as he slowly mended himself. I know he doesn't believe me when I told him he's the strongest person I know, but it's the truth. I couldn't help but fall into awe, he held the courage I couldn't even fathom. He had a phobia so strong that he had a mini panic attack at just the sight of it, but he punched through it and I can't help the pride that filled me up inside.

"I like your laugh."I whisper gently as I stare into his mesmerising orbs. His cheeks instantly flood with that cute light blush as he tries to hide his face into my chest, an act I find infinitely cute. I chuckle at his innocent act and place a light kiss on his head.

I lead him out the bathroom back to my bedroom and let him sit on my bed as I go hunting for clothes. I really have no idea what I'm going to do about this, he's half the size of me and I don't have any old clothes from when I was younger, I left it all back at my previous home. Faced with this predicament I still rummage helplessly through my draws and cupboard.

I finally find a semi appropriate long leaved shirt and the smallest pair of boxers I own and some old joggers I wasn't sure was going to fit. All the while Asher sat silently on my bed, shivering slightly from the cold, waiting but not complaining on the Ridiculous amount of time I took to get the clothes.

"This is smallest thing I could find, "I say handing the fabrics to him. He takes it with a shaky arm and offers my a pure, kind smile silently saying his thank you, still being a bit shook from what happened.

"I'm going to take a quick shower myself, your free to get some rest. You can take the bed I'm going to pull out an air bed for myself."I offer. He still remains silent but his eyes show me his gratitude. With that I grab some clothes for myself and head for the bathroom.

The hot water hitting my skin in jets feels like heaven. Ive been in damp, cold clothes from the rain this entire time, but when I was with Asher I didn't feel the discomfort at all, I didn't feel the cold or the wet clothes clinging to my skin so the water on my skin feels twice as satisfactory than having a shower any other day. I quickly wash up and shampoo my hair before setting out the shower, instantly being hit with the rush of cold air against my skin sending shiver and goosebumps through me. I get changed in the bathroom into the clothes I brought with me, I don't think Asher would be at all comfortable if I got changed in my room.

Asher's small form lay in my bed covered in the duvet, his steady breathing telling me he was already asleep. I smile inwardly at him looking so peacefully, so free of care and worry. I don't think I have ever seen him with out a slight sense of caution and fear, he's always afraid, always looking over his shoulder, but now he seems so blissful that It pains me that he can only achieve that in his sleep, when he is no longer in the burdens of this reality. I want to eradicate all his fear, I want to make him feel safe again, feel free. But most of all, I wanted to find the mother fucker that did this him, caused him to be this lost, and I wanted to make them suffer, make them hurt and make sure they never touch a hair on his body ever again. I knew it was somewhat of an empty threat, that I wasn't violent by nature like some, but this was Asher and for some reason that gave me this new wave of confidence, new wave of rage and hostility I never felt before.

I leave the room just as Lily leaves hers, catching her eye.

"How is he?"She asked timidly, her voice slightly cracked and eyes shot red. It shot a new wave of pain and guilt that I was the reason she was in this state.