Cursed Days

Cold Picture

It is not that I did not know that it will happen one day. Both of us actually knew it would, eventually, whether we liked it or not. The difference is that, both of us expected it to happen for both of us, together, which is what exactly we were not supposed to expect. Even though days have rusted, memories have elapsed, and the ravishing heartbeats slowly went down to sleep, there was still a part in both of our scattered innocent expectations, that us could have happened, and that it was us together, not to with other. With the years passing by, both of us bloomed and gloomed in our miseries and glories. Sometimes I used to wish the stars for telling you how great I am at one part of my life, to the extent that I wanted to share the glory with you, yet for your absence, it was a crying victory. At other times though, I used to wish the stars to play their curse on you and your life, and the day I have touched your presence by the vision of my eyes, just for the pain that I cannot expunge. It's been said that with time pain goes away, and if both of us could rephrase it, then it would be the only thing we both do together after leaving each other, which is that it is not the pain that goes away, it is that we live with it so much, that we can't recognize it anymore. What bounces back hard, every single time, is that deep down, both of us know that we are nothing but a delusion carried by the dust that irritates no one but us. This dust, is what roams around our instincts and our divided knowledge, on admitting that finally, our expectations of being together failed, and that what we expected to happen for us, happened, but not for US, together, and by that, every time we look into anything that depicts or represents a ray from a slightly opened window of our private lives to the world, both of us, you and I, are attacked by our own dust of the past, and we can't put to sleep the echoes of our buried love and our living pain.