When We Were Young

LIII: 18

After our quiet meal, we walk back to the motel. We change into our swimming clothes, Gray in just his boxers and me in a plain red triangle bikini top with matching bottoms.

Normally, I would feel awkward flouncing around in front of Gray in the small pieces of fabric I currently have on, but my mind is still preoccupied with my decision. It's like I can barely focus on any other thoughts.

He notices this. He's telling some story about a crazy time he and his college friends went swimming and all he gets in response from me are a few disheartened "wow"s and "hmm"s. Gray doesn't comment though, understanding that there's something I haven't shared yet clearly taking space in my mind.

As predicted, the water is extremely cold. I dip my big toe in gingerly and immediately recoil, feeling the frigid liquid shock my spread through body.

On the other hand, Gray jumps into the lake without a care for how he may freeze to death in there. I stare open-mouthed at him as he flips his wet hair out of his eyes for more reasons than just the fact that he seems indifferent to the cold after complaining about how cold it'd be.

The sky is dark now and only a distant light from the motel illuminates the water a dark blue colour. Far from the city, I can begin to see stars in the sky from my spot on the shore.

"What are you waiting for?" Gray calls, swimming in small circles.

"It's too cold!" I yell back.

Even from a far distance and in the dimness, I can make out the are you kidding me face that Gray currently wears.

"Don't be a wuss!"

"I'm not!" I respond indignantly. "I just don't want to get hypothermic, my body is already cold enough from just standing out here."

He bobs his head below the water and I can make out his dark form swimming towards shore. When the lake becomes too shallow, he pulls himself upwards, losing his balance in the process, and falling on his ass a few feet from where I stand.

I stifle a giggle unsuccessfully.

Scanning his palms for any cuts, he then eyes me. "You don't get to laugh, Rick. Especially since swimming was your idea and now you won't even get into the water."

He lifts himself out again, this time more carefully. With a few large steps, he makes his way in front of me and wraps his very cold body around my warm one. I squirm in between his arms, but not very forcefully as I find myself enjoying this position, despite the coldness and wetness of it all.

Half-heartedly, I push him away. "Gross, stop that."

"See not that bad," he insists. Continuing, he decides to play to my logical and fair side. "You know, it's shitty when you make a decision and then you don't follow through with it."

I know he's talking about swimming, but my mind wanders to the scholarship again.

I made the decision of applying for the scholarship and now, I am not following through with it.

I also made the decision to study business and listen to my mother's wisdom, but I was also thinking of not going through with that.

Gray must notice the change in my demeanor and my stiffening in his arms because he pulls back and looks at me in a way that makes me feel as though my mind is being x-rayed by his. "Okay, something is wrong. Is it the sleeping arrangement because if you're uncomfortable--"

Not allowing him to go down that path again, I interrupt, "It's not that. I just have a lot of stuff to think about... with my mom and the scholarship."

His lips quirk to the side and he nods. "Okay. I'm here to talk, if you need it."

For a moment, I feel the urge to spill everything to him about my complicated family history, but the words don't leave my throat. This has all been too much for me today. I barely acknowledge my mom's past usually and today, it hasn't left my mind after that couple in the fish and chips restaurant. It's too much.

Another part of me knows that I don't tell Gray because he's been such a supporter of me following my own path in life and cutting off my parents if it came to that. If he found out that I'm giving into my mother's wishes, he wouldn't understand.

Before I can get another word in, Gray bends down and puts one arm around my thighs. He extends his legs and I'm off the ground, being carried into the water.

"Gray!" I spit out, hanging upside down with an interesting view of his butt.

When we are far enough in the lake, where most of Gray's long legs are covered by water and my calves are completely submerged, he drops me. I get in one last breath before I am enveloped by the coldness.

Re-emerging, I gasp for air and look for the perpetrator. He's the one laughing now.

I messily push all the wet hair out of my face and walk towards him. The water makes walking difficult, so it must look like I'm in slow motion to anyone who may be watching, including Gray. This makes him laugh harder.

I use all my strength to splash him with water once I am within arms reach.

By the glisten of competition that I see in his eyes, I know that I have just started a splashing war.

We each try to create the biggest waves at each other, which is inherently unfair, in my opinion. Gray has way bigger and longer arms than I do, so obviously I am going to get more splashed than he is.

By the end of it, we are both heaving and wiping salt water out of our eyes.

"See? It isn't cold, is it?" He white teeth are extra bright in the moonlight.

For real, though. The water actually feels kind of warm?

Not wanting to admit defeat, I backhand his shoulder. "Oh, shut up."

I notice a leaf inside of Gray's curls and move closer to him in the water. We are at a perfect depth of water, where the surface of it just covers our abdomen and falls right underneath the chest.

Gently, I pick it out. It's a small green leaf that must've fallen into the water from the nearby trees that are blooming. I tap him on the nose with it teasingly before throwing it over my shoulder, back into the water.

I'm about to joke about winning the splashing contest since I somehow got a leaf lodged into his hair, when he leans over and places his mouth onto mine.