𝗧𝗿𝗮𝘂𝗺𝗮

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by stylesabove

by stylesabove

TW: talks about rape. if this topic triggers you please go ahead and skip this one. you've been warned.

also i don't really write stuff like this so it's definitely not going to be the best so bare with me on this one.

y/n's pov

my boyfriend, harry and i have been dating since sophomore year of high school and we're currently in our junior year. we're going on our one year anniversary together. i couldn't be more happier and i hope he feels the same happiness i do. we're currently at my house, in my room watching netflix. however we aren't paying attention to it, if you get what i'm saying.

i drag my hand down from his neck to his chest as the kiss gets more heated each second. we've been in this position before so it's nothing i'm not used to. however, it feels more passionate this time. almost like he wants to prove his love for me. well it's working if that's the case.

harry moves his hand from my jaw down to my neck, giving it a small squeeze before moving on to my boobs. he gives it a light squeeze once again. a low moan leaves my mouth, him giving a more rough squeeze knowing i liked it. another soft moan leaves my lips. harry pulls away from the kiss looking at me, "i think i found something you like," he smirks at me, biting his lip. "yes you did," i say back, also biting my lip. "you're so hot," he replies and then kisses me again, no hesitation to slip his tongue in my mouth, making me moan again. i love this feeling so much.

he once again, squeezes my boob, with more force. he travels his hand down further my body, slipping his hand under my shirt, sliding his hand over my bra. i pull away breathless, "i love how you make me feel." he smirks, "good."

i attack his lips once again sliding my hands down to his waist gripping it. harry once again pulls away, flipping us so i'm under him, with both of his knees on either side of my waist. he pulls his shirt off over his head, throwing it to the side, attacking my neck, making sure to leave marks. soft moans leave my mouth once again. his fingers make there way down to the end of my shirt, tugging lightly. "can i," he asks after he breaks away from the kiss. "yes." it doesn't take him long till he lifts my shirt over my head.

his lips travel down my body making there way just below my bellybutton. his fingers tug at the top of my shorts, his eyes locking with mine, asking for permission once again, which i nod with a bit of hesitation. his fingers unbutton my shorts and pull them down.

flashbacks flash through my head from a year and a half ago. my heartbeat started to get faster the more i started to freak out. harry starts to tug at my underwear but i stop him. "stop!! no!! stop, please!!!" tears run down my face. harry immediately stops what he's doing when he hears my cries. he looked freaked out until he decides to comfort me. he climbs up my body and brings me into his arms, "hey, hey, it's okay." i cry in his shoulder even more. "it's okay, i'm here," he says lowly, rubbing circles on my back to calm me down. it always calmed me down.

"i-i'm sorry," i stutter, tears still streaming down my face. "it's okay baby, i'm not mad," he replies. "you sure? i feel like i ruined it," i reply. "no baby, you didn't." i look up to see his eyes already on me. "i love you," he says, "always." "i love you too baby," i reply, kissing his cheek. he smiles, but it doesn't reach his eyes. "i feel like i should explain," i say looking down again in shame. "hey, it's okay, i don't need to know." "i want to, i just... i'm going to have to take a few minutes." "take all the time you need, i'm not pressuring you into saying something."

i love that about him. he won't pressure me into telling him stuff and he'll let me take all the time i need. i'm very thankful i have him in my life.

a few minutes pass and i'm ready to tell him. "a year and a half ago, i...," i start. a tear falls once again. harry grabs my hand with his open one, tracing circles on the front of it. "i was... r-raped," i say breaking down in tears once again. i feel harry tense as the words left my mouth. i slowly peer up at him to see his reaction. i see tears streaming down his face and my heart breaks. i wipe his tears away, not liking the way he looks with tears streaming down his face. "no don't cry, please don't cry," i say. "i'm so so sorry that happened to you," he replies looking into my teary eyes. "i'm so fucking sorry," he says again, also breaking down. i move to sit up on his lap, bringing his body into mine, hugging him harder than ever. he wraps his arms around my waist tightly. we cry into each others shoulders. i slowly rub his back to calm him down. "it's okay harry, you don't have to cry," i say into his neck. "but i am. i had to clue and you went through that alone. i wish i could've taken all that away from you," he replies.

my heart swells when he said that. that just proves how much he cares about me. "it's okay, love," i tell him cradling his face in my hands. "no, it's not y/n, i would've helped you through it, i would've held you when you felt bad, i would've been there for you every day all day. i would take all that pain away from you if i could, because you don't deserve any of it," he tells me with more tears running down his face. more tears run down mine as i say, "i get it harry. i know you would but i didn't know any of this was going to happen for you to feel like that. i thought i was ready to move to the next step with you but i guess not. but i'll be okay, i promise. i'm not as depressed as i was when it happened, i'm in a good place now, i don't want you to be down over something i can't control."

i once again, wipe tears from his cheeks. "i'm just... i don't know. i wish i could've been there for you and i get that you might have thought you were ready and i'm in no rush, i can wait till whenever you are. i would never force you to do anything your not comfortable with and i would never force myself onto you," he says. i smile at him, "i know you wouldn't. i love you." "i love you too baby." i pull him into me once again to hug him. he stay like that for awhile until i pull away to kiss him. he kisses me back with so much passion i start to feel dizzy.

"how about we just cuddle and watch netflix," harry suggests. "i would love that," i say with a small smile. he smiles at me, "you're so cute." i blush and put on supernatural (idk 😭). i cuddle up to him and we watch our show.