Question 13

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Question 13:

If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else what would you want to know?

*swallows* I would ask if my brother really hates me like he pretends since I left.

I'm sure he doesn't.

I don't know. That's why I would ask it. You?

-It is clear that he doesn't want to talk about it anymore-

I don't know. I don't really want to know something about my future, because it would give me the feeling that I couldn't have an influence on my own future anymore. And for my part I need this feeling, even if it might be wrong. I can't stand feeling useless. Maybe I would ask what would have happened if my mother hadn't died. It's something I have wondered about a lot and it wouldn't make me feel useless about my future. I mean I could also ask if I'll turn out to be like my father at some point, but I guess I didn't believe it if the answer was no, and I- *swallows hard and has tears in his eyes* -couldn't bear it if the answer was yes. I guess I would kill myself before it could happen anyway. I don't want anyone to have to suffer like I did, and I would be so disgusted by myself if I let it happen, to let myself go as much as he did.

*takes a deep breath*

Question 14?

*nods*

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