Heartbeat ~ a tribute

7.

This chapter is written by Scorbus11 here on Wattpad. She was Kat's best friend on the app, so I asked her to write something. She did a beautiful job of writing it.

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I remember the day I met Kat, April 25th, 2020. She had commented on my story, one simple comment about how she was crying at 12:50 am because I wrote an emotional oneshot, I had replied saying we live in the same time zone and I was so happy about that. After that I started reading her story and she had messaged me a few days later. It was a start of a friendship, I knew instantly that it'd be the start of something great.

For months me and her had developed a friendship, we told each other things that we didn't tell anyone else, we became online best friends. There was something about her that I just knew I could trust her and she said she trusted me too. I remember when everything went downhill, it was in November, she had just returned online and everything seemed to be going fine. But the darkness was surrounding both of us and trying to swallow us away. At the time she was all I had, but I was scared that she had too much on her plate to be worried about me. With her mom's cancer getting worse and Nick getting really sick I didn't want to burden her, but she didn't like that I was trying to keep my problems hidden. She helped me stand back up on my own two feet and I hope that I helped her get through things as well. Kat was the light in the darkest of times, she made me smile, laugh, and just feel happy for once. I'll never forget her stubbornness, jokes, and quirky comments. She was everything anyone can ask for. I remember telling her that when she was feeling down to blame the three gray sisters in Percy Jackson because they're crazy.

The day Nick told me about the car accident I swear I stopped breathing. I couldn't breathe until a few days later when he said she'd live. When I was told she had acute amnesia I was devasted, I believed she wouldn't remember me, but she did. She couldn't remember a few months before the accident and a part of me was kinda happy about that cause many bad things happened, but when I was told she couldn't remember Aaron my heart stopped beating. She loved Aaron so much and I couldn't believe she couldn't remember. I remember wishing she forgot me instead because I'm just the online friend a few states away from her.Even tho the doctor said she couldn't text anybody she still went out of her way to text me. We talked a few times since her accident, but January 14th, was the last time I ever talked to her. We were talking and she started talking about how she felt like she was burning alive, but she refused to take a break. At the time I was having chest pains and constantly tired and she was worried about me, but I was more worried about her than me.

That day she kept saying she didn't think she'd live much longer, she tried to tell me goodbye, but I refused to believe she'd die. When she finally stopped torturing herself to talk to me and took a break the last thing she said to me was "I'll be back soon" but she never came back that night... A part of me blames myself for this, she shouldn't of been texting me and overworking herself, she should've been relaxing instead. A week went by and Nick told me that she was gone. My heart shattered, I stopped breathing, and I cried for hours, I don't normally cry either. My best friend was gone, someone on this earth who actually understood me was gone, just like that. For the last month I've been numb, I never got to tell her that I was ok and that nothing was wrong with me except for a small condition that wasn't life threatening or dangerous. Whenever something happens my brain tells me that I needa text her and tell her everything, but the day she died I texted her on discord and the text went red and unsent. In that moment I died because I knew I'd never be able to talk to her again.

A world without Kat is not worth living in, but if I know my friend I know she'd want us all to he happy and not sad about her death. Where a part of me wants her to still be here, I know she's no longer suffering where she's at. I'll miss her, but I know she's looking down on us all smiling. I hope I can make her proud. Kat if you're reading this just know that...

I miss you so much.

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My turn to cry at 12 in the morning...