Forgotten Forest Poetry

Love Letter.

If you didn't know: 

I am in a very happy relationship currently. I have been for a decent amount of time. If you follow me on IG, you'll know that I recently decided to finally talk publicly about them, but I'm keeping their identity secret. 

I've had some pretty nasty situations in the past, and I'm too happy in this relationship to risk absolutely anything in it. 

And before you ask too many questions, I'll answer some of them: 

1. How long? A while. 

2. Who? I told you, secret. You won't hear about it until we get married, which is hopefully soon. We want to save up money. Go big or go home, ya know? 

3. Why did you keep it a secret for so long? Lots of reasons, and it'll stay this way for a while. Mainly, they aren't a big Internet Person^tm in general, so I don't want to force them into a world they aren't comfortable in, ya know? (They're older than me, and "don't do the internet thing" but god, do they love memes and animal vids. Cutest thing.)

4. You guys live/lived together? Yep. Currently not living together because of Panda-demictic reasons. 

5. Does your family know? Those who matter know, approve and are happy for me. 

And if you care, I am happy. They inspire me to be better, they inspire me to continue, and they understand me like no one has in... years, I'd say. They keep me growing. :) <3 

I was partially inspired to write this because we decided on V-day to do a cutesy fancy pantsy proposal, and wanted to have a nice wedding. AND because today is my parents 20th anniversary, so I'm particularly romantic, I guess? 

Anyway! Again, if you follow on me on IG, and want to skip the dorkiness, i don't blame you. :) 

Annnnnd... yeah :) 

__

I met you 2 years ago,

And your presence bubbled at the bottom of my stomach,

And rose to my heart,

Deep in a space once forgotten,

And you laid patient hands on a trembling chest,

Your fingers traced every flaw,

And your eyes fell into the infinity of me,

And my eyes fell into yours,

And I'll never forget how you looked,

Morning heavy in your eyes,

Your curly hair wrapped, falling to the sides of the bun,

Tangled in white sheets,

And a house that finally feels like home,

To place your lips on mine,

And cuddle naked in our living room...

I had forgotten happiness,

I'd forgotten it long ago,

It had tangled in a web of lies,

Drowned in silhouettes that chased empty hallways...

The honesty that flows between the gentle space in parted lips,

A rawness I had never been witness to,

The curl of your lips,

Lopsided,

The belly ache of your laugh,

Slurred words in drunken confessions,

Silent drives with your fingers tangled in mine,

The first time we ordered online,

Because of the pandemic,

And we fucked up the order,

So we had "baby water."

The times we drove in empty roads,

And the cops trailed behind us,

And we giggled about us in handcuffs,

The stress of the night I lost my job,

And you lost yours shortly after.

Uncertainty,

Tense,

And figuring out how to make it work.

When our mental health reached an all-time low.

We crawled from the bottom up,

With only hope and pennies in our hands.

I'm glad it was with you,

Because you gifted me strength to hope,

And you gave me the confidence to grow,

To be unafraid,

To be brave,

To be loved,

Even under the worst of conditions.

So, yeah.

Things are not always flowers,

And we say things out of pain,

And you won't always understand me,

And I won't always understand you,

But we can try, and have empathy on the way.

I love you. 

_ 

You won't read this, but I'll read it to you later, mi amore. :) <3 

See you soon, baby. I miss you.