Strong - GRETHAN

Chapter 9

It's been a few days since mine and Ethan's kiss, and so far, he's kept his promise. He comes over every day and Chloe is super happy about it. We don't get much time alone but we manage to have a couple smooches here and there, he's getting a little risky though... touching my thigh when we're sitting close to each other and staring at me with hungry eyes for a bit too long, he's going to get us caught if he doesn't stop. Yes, we have agreed on keeping this thing we have going on a secret, we are both closeted cases after all, even if I already got the name of little gay kid. Therefore the only time we get to be close is at my house or in the bathroom if Ethan wants to be really risky, but most of the time I refuse anyway

"C'mon Gray, please" Ethan begs, whispering in my ear while he's rubbing my thigh with his big hand, knowing exactly what effect it has on me. It makes me shudder slightly but I compose myself again and shake my head while whispering back. "No Ethan, not with Chloe here" I say sternly and he pouts. "Please, she's not going to know..." he says smirking slightly, moving his hand further up slowly to tease me and my breath hitches. He knows she's too involved in 'The Little Mermaid' to truly pay attention to what we were doing just behind her. Truth is, I didn't know if I wanted it yet. Not because I was a virgin and didn't trust Ethan, I really did, he's the only one I would want to lose it too. Something bigger, though, was waiting to be shown and I truly didn't know how to tell him, let alone show it to him, and I'm scared of how he's going to take it. He holds my jaw gently in place, leaning in to kiss my neck, but I jump up before he can and make up a lame excuse. "I- I have to go to the bathroom" I try to say casually but it is very obvious that it's a complete lie just to get away. I start walking away when Ethan tells me to wait and grips my forearm, which causes me to curse softly in slight pain. Only when I look up and see the look on Ethan's face, I realize the huge mistake I did, making my eyes go wide. I gave myself away.

When I catch Ethan on an off-guard moment, I fling my arm out of his grip and quickly run to the bathroom, shutting myself in the just in time before Ethan reached me. He starts bashing on the door, ordering me to open the door and I just cover my ears from the loud noise, my heart thumping in my chest. The banging eventually ceases, making me think he gave up and will eventually leave but I won't let my guard down, but apparently Ethan has a plan in mind, he's won't give up that easily. I suddenly hear the front door open and close and shortly after I am greeted by my sister's soft voice. "Gway why did Etan leave" I hear her ask softly and I sigh in response, I didn't really think he would give up that easily... I open the door, expecting to see my petite 5-year-old sister but I'm instead greeted by Ethan's tall, muscular figure. That was just a recording! I try to close the door on him as quick as I could but I am too slow and Ethan pushes through, grabbing my neck softly but with enough force to push me back into the bathroom as he barges through into the room and locks the door before towering over me against the bathroom counter, not thinking twice about what this sudden burst of dominance is doing to me.

"How did you -" I start but get cut off, him already knowing what I wanted to ask. "its not hard to make your sister say a few words if you make it out to be a game like tag and you're cheating" he explains, me impressed by his creativity. "I want answers..." he says, going back to serious mode "...Now" he growls out and I can't help it when my knees go weak and I shake slightly. "I-" I start but as if he read my mind, he interrupts me "Don't give me the 'I don't know' kinda crap right now Grayson. You know exactly what I want to know. Why did you hiss in pain when I grabbed you?" he says spelling it out for me as a way to not make me use that excuse anymore, the anger mixed with concern present. "I wouldn't know how anyway..." I say honestly. I really don't know how, I don't want to tell him yet I do, I don't want to show him but I want him to know... my mind is all over the place, I'm not even sure what I want. After a short pause, he talks again. "Take off your shirt" he says sternly and I look at him confused "I'm sorry what?" I ask raising an eyebrow "Take off your shirt then..." he repeats "If you can't tell me then show me" he ends his statement with. I almost laugh right at his face, but I see his serious look and contain my sarcastic laugh for another time "Are you being serious right now? You really think I'm just going to take my shirt off just like that?" I ask rhetorically, obviously knowing the answer but wanting to hear him say it "If you don't, I will do it myself" he says, clearly getting impatient with this whole situation "What if I don't want to" I state more than ask, my voice coming out weak "I know you do Gray" he says calmly yet still with a hint of being stern "How? How do you know if I don't" I say somewhat calmly yet with a hint of sad desperation laced through it "Because your eyes are begging, begging to let this out but holding back... so let me do the work and take off your shirt" he says serious yet lovingly, his tone going stern again near the end. I hesitate, I know he's right but I still can't. I can't move, I can't speak, I can't do anything but just stand there. "I-" I start off but my voice failing me "Grayson let me in, let me help you" he says softly, trying to calm me down. "What if you can't..." I ask him softly, my voice wavering a bit, almost sounding like I was going to cry. "There's always a way, we just have to find it" he says softly, bringing his hand to my cheek and I lean into his touch, his thumb gently grazing my skin. We stay like that for a couple of minutes and I eventually give in, my hands gently grazing the hem of my hoodie yet not pulling it up because I physically can't as my body wont more. He slowly slipped a hand under the thick material, stopping just over my hip bone and rubbing the skin there in a comforting way, making me shiver slightly, yet his calming words soothed me instantly. He got the message that I wasn't going to be removing the item of clothing any time soon by myself so he took the initiative and started slowly raising the hoodie past my chest and over my head, soon to be discarded at our side. I'm afraid to look at his reaction yet I still look up at him and his face shows exactly what I was expecting.

His eyes are roaming over my exposed upper half, analysing the bruises and cuts scattered around it. I see his Adams apple bob as he swallows the lump in his throat and his jaw going in a rhythmical clench and unclench motion. I hug myself, feeling exposed and small under his strong gaze but he doesn't move my arms away, either not needing to or understanding my discomfort. "Are these..." he trails off, not knowing exactly what words to use to ask, but I already know what he wants to ask so I answer him directly. "No, they are not self-harm. At least not anymore..." I reply softly and I see his nostrils flare and go back to their normal positions continuously, probably a method to contain his frustration and I'm not sure to which part, if the self-harm part or the fact that these markings aren't my doing. He runs his hands up my chest, his fingertips gently grazing the bruise marked skin with featherlight touches. I see his eyes roam over the purple/black markings, some yellow ones standing out a bit less, a clear indication that those are some faded bruises. His eyes follow down my arm, the dark crimson cuts standing out against my sun kissed skin. "Who did this to you?" he asks and I stay silent, I couldn't tell him the person who did this because... Well... I just couldn't. "Gray I can't help you if you don't talk" he starts with a warning tone.
I master up all the courage I have before answering with this simple phrase

"it was my... "

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Word count: 1572

I decided to do a MUCH shorter chapter but leave you on a cliffhanger :3 you can hate me lol
What do you think tho? I really don't know what I'm doing I want some feedback on what you think of it so far and what I could change to make it better

Hope you enjoyed! I love you all and thanks for reading <3

Bye bye