A Drug that Changed My Life - Cashby

Chapter One

I heard a sketchy sci-fi noise coming from my iPhone. Ugh, time to get up already? I reached my hand over to my dock, grabbing my phone off it. Fuck. School. Monday was always the worst day of the week. Joy, the start to another week at school, alone, being teased about being a 'soulless ginger' and other un-creative insults, certainly something to look forward to. In eighth grade, you'd assume people had matured a bit more, but nope, they had to prove you wrong. I've been dealing with the teasing for a few years now, ever since I came to this god damned school. I had found my way to deal, and honestly it wasn't that bad of a way. Right? I looked down at my legs, which were bare besides the loose-fitting boxers I slept in. I ran my hands over my legs, the fresh cuts, the old scars. No one cared enough to ask, and I wasn't about to tell, but I'd been cutting since sixth grade. It gave me control, relief from the emotional pain I felt, if even just for a while. Now, I just felt compelled to do it, to feel something besides the numbness that always seemed to haunt me. Even at home, the torture never stopped. It's just something I've learned to live with. 

I got up out of my bed, walking to my dresser to grab some clothes for the day. I grabbed a pair of boxers, a Pink Floyd shirt and a pair of black skinny jeans. If kids are gonna tease you about what you wear, at least wear something you love, am I right? I walked across the hall, into the bathroom. I turned on the shower, waiting for it to warm up. I stripped off my boxers then stepped in the shower, letting the warm water surround my body. I cringed at the hot water hitting my cuts, even though I felt that on a daily basis. I washed my hair and soaped myself down, then rinsed myself. I stepped out and grabbed the nearest towel, drying myself off. I slipped on my clothes then ran a comb through my longish hair. I walked into my room to find Sophie, my black cat, sleeping on my bed. I sat down beside her and pulled her on to my lap, petting her.

"Hi there Sophie," I smiled as she started purring. I had always had a thing for cats. My parents didn't understand why, they preferred dogs, but after a lot of begging I finally got a kitty to call my own. Well, actually, found is more like it. I was walking home from school one day, and she was sleeping in the corner of a building, soaking wet, and skinny as hell. I, of course being the cat person I am, felt obligated to help the poor kitty, so I took off my jacket and wrapped it around her, carrying her home and giving her a good meal. I kept her hidden from my parents for a few days, in my room, so that even if they wouldn't let me keep her she'd at least be healthier for whoever took her in. When my parents found out about Sophie... well, my mum felt guilty after what my dad did, and she convinced him to let me keep her.

"Alan! I've got to get going soon, are you catching a ride?" My mum asked me. Normally, I'd catch a ride with her then walk home, so that my father wouldn't know, but today I felt like walking both ways. Walking meant I could listen to my music in peace, and not face the tortures of school so early.

"Naw, I'll walk today!" I called back, and she said good bye. I looked out my window, to see what the weather was like. It was April, so it was always pretty warm. It was kind of dark though, like it was going to rain. Normally, I wouldn't bring my jacket with me, because I avoid wearing it as much as possible, but I decided it would be better than being soaked all day. I layed back down on my bed, spreading my arms above me, with Sophie on my lap still. "Sophie," she stood up and started walking up my chest. "Why are people so mean? I don't want to do this anymore..." I trailed off, thinking of how I never did anything to anyone at this school... I don't even remember how it all started. And to make it worse, we didn't even have a true middle-school, because the school board is cheap, so I can't even escape the people in my class. Sophie rubbed against my cheek, then laid down beside me, right above my shoulder. I grabbed my phone to check the time. "Well, baby, it's time for me to leave," I kissed Sophie's head. I walked over to her food and water dishes, making sure they were full, then headed out the door, starting on the journey to school. I put in both my ear buds, turning up my music, tuning out the world.

***

"Okay class, before we get started today, we're getting a new seating arrangement." There was a collective groan from the class, me included. Hopefully I wouldn't be beside someone too horrible, because we'd probably be stuck like this for the rest of the year. The teacher put an overhead of our new seating arrangement up, and I looked for my name. Alan Ashby, found it, beside... oh god. I'm beside Austin Carlile. I mean, I had nothing against the kid, he's quiet and doesn't torture me, but doesn't particularly like me, so what was I supposed to think? "Okay, you can now move to your new seats." I reached into my desk and pulled out my belongings. Joy, the rest of the year, six hours a day, five days a week, beside someone who hates me. It was bad enough we didn't have rotary like middle schools should, but seating arrangements just make avoiding people and keeping to yourself harder. I moved my stuff over to my new desk and took my seat, organizing my things inside. I noticed Austin was talking quite a while to move, and saw how disorganized he was. At least he couldn't get mad at me for being disorganized, because that's how my desk always ends up. Fortunately, I had cleaned it a few days ago, so I was all good for organization currently. Austin finally sat down beside me and started organizing his desk.

"Hey," I looked at him, trying to make things less painful for the two of us. He grumbled a hi back, and I just turned back towards the chalkboard, letting out a breath and going off into my own little world.

***

It was shortly after lunch, so everyone was happy to have had some time off class. We were just about to start math, my best subject. The teacher had told us to get out our textbooks, but Austin wasn't, he only had his notebook out. I tool out my textbook and flipped to the page we were on, then sat it down between Austin and I. He looked at me and I gave him a nervous smile. I had assumed he left his textbook at home or something, and my assumptions were proven correct when he mouthed thanks to me. He turned back to the front and looked down at his paper, copying down the work we were expected to do. He had really gorgeous eyes... I had always had a thing for brown eyes. I looked up at the board and got started on the work, not bothering to copy down the pages because I knew I'd get it all done in class.