Sin For Me

Chapter 10 ☑️

Mason

What the hell was I thinking—kissing her like that...so soon, I scolded myself as I ventured out into the downpour outside to retrieve Megan's belongings.

Megan was so unpredictable—nothing was going according to plan. Not with her. She completely disarmed me. I was vulnerable, exposed in her presence.

But isn't this the moment you've fantasized of for years, my inner demon reprimanded me. The woman of my dreams stood before me, wholly offering herself, but yet, I retreated. What if I never got the chance again to have her that close— to taste to sweetness of her plump lips and to feel her desire. I may have blew my chance, I realized.

I angrily impelled my thoughts aside and made my way to the car.

The rain pelleted against my skin, washing away bits of the fury that had built up within me, and an exasperated sigh escaped my lips. My fate rested on the other side of the door to my home, and uncertainty of her current mood clouded my mind. Would she give me another chance to prove to her that I was as interested in her as she was in me? I hoped so.

Undoubtedly, the chemistry amongst us as our bodies flushed one another was inevitable. She had a hold on me greater than she would ever begin to fathom—but yet, she was clueless. I had sent mixed signals when I left her wanting, longing for me on that sofa. My intentions with her hadn't been transparent to her from the moment I brought her here.

The expression sketched on Megan's beautiful, flushed face following our sporadic kiss was pure desire. Passion. Needless to say, we were one in the same.

I wasn't sure I could trust myself enough not further our encounter, so I had to halt the kiss and detach her body from mine as soon as possible.

She longed for more, likely as much as I did—lust for me was engraved deep within her glossy green eyes as she scanned my body, licking her plump, swollen lips.

Instead, I turned my back on her, leaving her unsatisfied and fairly displeased. As the coward I was.

My reasoning for my poor decision deemed rational at the time, however. Megan had bore so much pain throughout the years I had known her, and if I were to pursue her, I needed to do it properly. Screwing her senseless during her first official night with me definitely wouldn't put off the best first impression, nor render my true intentions either. She needn't think I wanted solely for her body—I wanted it all with her. I wanted to own her mind, body, and soul. I wanted those long-forgotten nights to wipe away her tears as she vented her every worry to me.

My mission was to show her what a lifetime of love truly consisted of. I never was a hearts and flowers kind of guy, but for her I could be. She deserved the best in life, and I wanted to be the guy to give it all to her.

Megan had already wasted so many years of her life with a selfish asshole who never loved her and did nothing other than cause her pain. I didn't want her impression of me to align with that prick of husband she had.

I wanted things to be different with us. I needed them to be—for her. I fancied taking her out to luxurious dinners, relish her in the beauties of the city, and spoil her in every way possible.

I didn't want to be cause of her tears, but rather the shoulder she cried on when she was upset. Like she has done numerous times before. I wanted to be the only man she depended on for her every want and need.

I longed to wake up to her beautiful smile, her body intertwined within mine every morning, and holding her tight every against my chest each night as we slept.

Most importantly, I needed her to love me back—the type of unconditional, heart-stopping love I had for her from behind closed doors for so many years.