Crows and Crooked Tiaras

CHAPTER FOUR

CHAPTER FOUR: QUEEN OF THE UNDERWORLD

LUNA'S POV

For the hundredth time, my fingers skim the hem of my dress, playing and pulling down the fabric. Being nervous isn't something I'm used to, especially in the context of doing anything in the pleasure district. Still, I adjust my dress again, smoothing out the black fabric, debating on pulling it down to offer myself a little more cover. It's strange, to feel self conscious in clothing like this. I guess it's because now I'm purposefully trying to get male attention, when normally it's just a side effect.

I try to remind myself that this isn't the same as what's happened. It's a simple thing. I'll get the attention of whatever stranger Kaz points out, and they'll do what they need to do before I have to do anything. To calm myself, I fluff my hair from the roots, hoping that the familarness of the motion will get my brain to realize that this is only a variation of something normal. I could probably even give that guy a fake name. Maybe I'll be Lola or Noelle or--I think this dress is a Jane; I could be Jane.

I smile a bit at that, finding comfort in having a new personality for the night. I wonder what type of person Jane is; I'll figure it out on the way there.

"Luna?" Turning, I see Inej in the doorway, her gaze clearly angled away from me. "Are you ready?"

"You can look, I'm decent." She turns and I take the opportunity to take her in. She's taller than me, but she's small in a strange way. No, she's not small in a weak way, she's small as if she is destined to be a disappearing act. Everything from the way she stands to the dark stealth suit she wears that covers all of her makes it seem like she's already in the process of vanishing. In a way, I am envious. "You look cool."

The words are awkward but genuine, she smiles wryly. "And you look," I expect a polished version of slutty, she takes a moment to take me in, "Like you could take anything you want from a man."

At that, I grin genuinely. "I think that's the best compliment I've ever gotten."

"You deserve it," she muses, "You know it's brave to move so confidently in front of men that are..."

I shake my head, not wanting to discuss this. "Thanks, but that's not bravery." It's a little too cold for what I'm wearing, but I didn't bring a jackett--besides, covering up defeats the purpose of the dress. "It's knowing that the worst thing they could do to you has already been done."

My voice is generic, but I see the slightest amount of recognition flicker across her features. "I've lost the same and it's made me feel the opposite."

Swallowing once, I frown. There's no way that we're talking about the same thing, right? I study her face, she's too composed, too blank. No one looks that calm unless they're trapped in a memory and trying desperately to hide it.

"Everyone reacts differently," I mumble, "Copes differently."

Inej nods once, "We should get going." I start to walk out of the small room. "Aren't you going to get cold?"

I shrug, "Used to it." As she turns, her hair hangs in a loose braid. "Do you need me to rebraid your hair?" The unexpectedness of my offer causes her to freeze. "Not that it looks bad, it just looks loose, and I used to braid my sister's hair all the time and when my cousins visit over the summer they ask me to do their hair like every day...so um--sorry, basically I just know a lot of ways to braid hair and your hair looked loose and I don't know what you're going to be doing, and I probably don't want to know what you're going to be doing, but you probably don't want hair in your face."

Even as a hostage, I have to be awkward. Inej tucks a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "I don't think we have time, but um--later maybe?"

Ah. Maybe if I think hard enough Kaz will get the memo that it's time and put me out of my misery. "Yeah, cool." He never kills me when it'd be convenient.