Just Some Johnlock Oneshots

Baby John

"Joh- what the hell?" Sherlock yelped. In front of him sitting on the carpet of the living room was a blond baby with John's wooly jumper pooled around it's small frame. "John?"

The baby was startled by the very tall man's loud voice and burst into tears.

Sherlock's mind shut down when he tried to think of ways to calm down a baby. He hesitantly crouched on the floor next to the baby. "H-hey kid, um, don't cry. I'm not going to hurt you," the detective stuttered. Unfortunately his words did nothing to calm the child. Surely when I turned into a child I wasn't so fussy.

"John, I need you to calm down." The crying continued and rose in volume. Sherlock pulled at his curls, frantically digging through the basement of his mind palace for something to do with babies. When he couldn't find anything, he settled on copying what little he had seen other people do with infants.

He gently grabbed baby John from under the armpits (making sure adult John's white undershirt was over him)and held him up an arms length away. John started squirming a lot, making Sherlock anxious he was going to fall. Instead of falling, John's large blond head rolled back on his neck. Hastily, Sherlock brought the boy against his chest, with a large hand cradling John's head.

Finally, the baby's cries quieted. John's round blue eyes darted across the detective's face until a look of recognition flashed across his pudgy features. He flailed his tiny hands up to touch Sherlock's cheeks and let out a pleased squeal.

"What in the world are you doing, John?" Sherlock huffed.

His annoyance made the baby giggle (although it sounded more like gurgles) and Sherlock was disgusted with himself when the thought of 'that's cute' temporarily crossed his mind. Why is John a baby now? I was a toddler a week ago. And John's older than me so why did I turn into a child and he's an infant?

John interrupted Sherlock's thoughts by babbling. "John, I can't understand a word you're saying," the detective sighed. "Now be quiet and let me think." The baby actually went silent for a bit, amusing himself by shoving his tiny fist into his mouth.

After a few minutes of thinking in relative silence (the horrible squelching noises coming from John's mouth and soaking wet hand were a bit distracting) Sherlock still couldn't think of an explanation for John's change. Speaking of change, Sherlock thought as John farted in the detective's arms. The boy squealed in delight at the funny noise as Sherlock wrinkled his nose. The dark haired man sighed deeply and quickly walked into the bathroom. He placed John on the counter next to the sink and stared at him.

"I can't handle this for long, John. You'd better turn back soon," Sherlock commanded. The baby cocked his head to the side with an odd look on his round face. Suddenly John started crying and Sherlock frantically picked him up and rocked him in his arms. John didn't stop, but only wailed louder.

"Shush, John! We don't want Mrs. Hudson to come up," Sherlock panicked but tried to keep his voice soft. He then realized the back of John's shirt was wet. With a huge sigh, the detective once again put the child down and shuffled through a cabinet, hoping to find some sort of rag to cover the boy. He didn't want John making a mess of the flat.

It took ten minutes, but Sherlock finally managed to wrestle the squirming baby into a rag diaper. It wasn't very secure, it was only kept in place with a knot that John kept trying to tug at. Sherlock plopped on the couch with John after throwing the soiled shirt in the hamper. The tall man was tugging at his curls because he was exhausted and John just couldn't keep quiet. He was currently working on a time sensitive case, but he can't just leave John defenseless. He just kept hoping John would turn back into an adult soon.

Baby John started to get fussy again, making short whiny noises that drove Sherlock insane (well more than he already is). With a roll of his teal eyes, the dark haired man lifted John up and rested the baby against his chest. John instantly settled down and clutched Sherlock's button up in his tiny fists. Sherlock couldn't help but gape at how adorable John looked. The detective always thought that John looked cute normally, but this was a whole different level.

John's chubby cheek was pressed against Sherlock's chest, making his face all scrunched up. The baby's eyes kept fluttering shut for a moment, then flinging open like he was going to miss something by going to sleep. Sherlock couldn't resist pressing a gentle kiss on the top of John's fluffy blond hair. The light blond hair softly tickled his nose and John cooed at the affection, both causing Sherlock to smile. He allowed himself to relax into a more comfortable position on the couch and held John closer to him. The supposed sociopath rubbed gentle patterns on the baby's bare back and began softly humming. Within a minute, John was deeply asleep.

Just as Sherlock was beginning to drift off, he felt a surge of electricity travel through the air. His eyes flew open as he jumped when a heavy weight engulfed him. That heavy weight was a now adult John still fast asleep against Sherlock. The detective's face flushed a deep red as he realized his hands were resting on top of John's bare skin, for the blonde was literally only in a rag. Well that little scrap's probably not covering anything anymore.

John started shifting around in Sherlock's lap as the dark haired man's motions pulled him from his deep sleep. Sherlock panicked, remembering when he transformed he had no memory of being a child. John was going to wake up naked in his arms with no recollection of what happened!

But it was too late for the detective to determine what to do, because John's gorgeous eyes were now open. The now older man let out a sleepy groan and pulled his head away from Sherlock's chest, but remained on his lap.

"Sherlock?" John asked in his precious sleepy voice. His brows furrowed as he looked down. Then his tan face turned bright red. "What the hell, Sherlock?" John yelled and pushed off of Sherlock's lap and onto the floor. With the movement, Sherlock quickly turned his head away. John glanced down at himself and let out a surprise noise before bringing his knees to his chest, somewhat covering his intimate areas.

"You turned into a baby," Sherlock said in a rushed breath. He slowly brought his gaze back to John's direction, his pulse increasing at the sight before him.

"What? I turned into a baby?" John asked in an affronted tone.

"Yes, just like I turned into a toddler a week ago. I still have no idea why, but you did."

"Oh." John went silent for a moment. "Could you get me some clothes?"

Sherlock jumped up and rushed to John's room. After bringing out John's pajamas and handing them to the man still curled up on the floor, he dashed into the kitchen. Within a minute John was standing next to Sherlock in front of the sink.

Sherlock avoided looking at John, but heard the blond let out a soft chuckle.

"It's fine, you idiot," John smiled. The taller man spun his curly head to face John. "I actually remember. I just didn't for the first minute or so. But thank you for taking care of me," John said with a sweet grin. He stepped forward and reached his head up to place a kiss on Sherlock's red stained cheek. John laughed as Sherlock's blush deepened. "I am really tired though and could use someone holding me as I fall asleep," he chuckled with a playful wink.

With that John turned to head to his room. After a few moments of consideration, Sherlock followed. 

I don't know why but I really struggled to write this one so I hope its not trash XD