"Air, I'm starving. Where are we gonna eat? Restaurant or you'll cook at home?" He asked me and I now he'll throw tantrums any minute now.
"Uh, I want to cook but if you're really hungry we can eat somewhere else."
"Fine. Let's go home and cook for me," he said before throwing Craig a quick glance and walked away again. Napanguso ako.
"Not a boyfriend, huh?" Craig insultingly said before walking away.
"Wait!"
"What?" He snapped looking so pissed. I bit my lip and his followed its movement.
"Stop biting your lip or else I'll do it with my own teeth. I've been waiting for you, Haven tapos makikita lang kita dito kasama ang isang batang totoy na feeling matanda?" I can't help but to giggle at his remark. He looked behind me.
"Take care of that kid first. Nakakahiya naman sainyo at mukhang kailangan mo pa asikasuhin." He said and rolled his eyes but he faced me before finally walking out. "Meet me at the dumbridge at 9."
I cooked for Carter but I can't help but to feel excited, I'm going to talk to him now. I thought mahihirapan akong abutin at kausapin ka pero ang tadhana na ata ang gumagawa ng paraan sa aming dalawa. Sana tuloy tuloy na.
"You look enthusiastic, what happened?" Carter asked when we finished eating. I looked at the wall clock at 7:30 pa lang.
"Hmm, wala naman. Where do you want yo go tommorow? I'll tour you here just like what you did to me in York." I said and smiled. I saw how his eyes widened and glittered. I know he love to have a tour here.
"Hell yeah! I'm gonna sleep now. G'night, Airhead." He said and kissed my cheek.
Inayos ko ang pinagkainan namin bago pumasok sa bathroom para mag ayos narin. Nag half bath ako at naghanap ng maayos na damit. Wala akong mahanap na maayos kaya isinuot ko nalang ang terno pajamas na bigay sakin ni Carter last year.
It's my favorite spongebob pajamas. At first, I wasn't used to it kaso palagi akong naka silk dress sa bahay namin ni Craig noon but I realized that it's too cold in York kahit may heater pa, and pajamas is way better.
It's 8:30 when I got out of our apartment. Nagpaalam muna ako sa landlady at sabi niyang wag ako mag alala dahil 24/7 naman ang tagabantay ng apartment. I made sure that Carter is already sleeping in his room since he is not locking the door as always naman.
I decided to just walk while my phone and wallet is on my pocket. Dumbridge is just four blocks away from here. It is a long bridge na nakaharap sa dagat, it is very beautiful there at night.
I looked at the both sides of the bridge and saw Craig on the right side where I am right now. I easily recognized him dahil hindi naman siya nagpalit ng damit at ganon parin ang kotse niya na nakaparada lang sa likod niya.
I slowly walked towards him and saw that the two canned beers he was holding earlier became six.. what is his problem this time?
I sat beside him and enjoyed the silence between us. It felt good being with him, na kahit tahimik lang ay ramdam mo pa rin ang presyensya niya.
"I used to go and drink here ever since," he said. Napaisip naman ako.
"So, everytime na naglalasing ka dito ka umiinom?"
"Yeah,"
"Oh, I thought you are is some.. bar," I said.
"Mia would always follow me even if I will always insult and call her names. I got tired eventually and just let her do what she wants," I bit my lip when I suddenly remembered what made me leave him years ago.
"You let her do what she wants.." I commented and smiled bitterly. Yes, it still hurts, but unlike before, I can manage the pain now. I heard him sigh.
"It's not what you think, Haven." He said at pinitik ang noo ko. Hinimas ko naman yon pero kinuha niya ang kamay ko at unti unting lumapit oara halikan ang pinitik niyang parte ng noo ko.
"I always regret everything right after you left. Every damn thing," sabi niya bago idinikit ang noo niya sakin. I think he is drunk again. Narinig ko ang buntong hininga niya bago lumayo.
"I let her do the things she wants to do like following me and such pero hindi yun lumampas doon. She knew you were going on my office that day. She wanted to ruin us so much that's why she did that. Trust me when I say she tricked me, Airthm. He made me believe that it was you doing that and if it wasn't because of you crying, baka nilabasan na ako sa bibig niya at mapatay ko lang ang sarili ko.
"I had no other choice but to endure her irritating presence because hee mother, Cynthia Juazon, is the best psychiatrist here in the Philippines. She does well everytime we meet and I can say that slowly, kahit sobrang liit lang ay may nagbabago. She is a great psychiatrist, pero mental health ng anak niya hindi niya mabantayan." Sabi niya bago ininom ang alak na hawak niya.
"The moment you left, I swore to myself na ipapagbasak ko silang dalawa. Oo, walang kinalaman ang nanay niya pero alam kong alam niya ang balak ng anak niya pero hinahayaan niya." Biglang kumuyom ang kamay niya at nagsitalsikan ang laman ng beer bago niya itinapon iyon sa basurahan.
"I was so fucking broken and lost, Airthm. You are my Haven, my refuge, and my angel. But that angel decided to leave me because I was a fucking jerk. And I was left with mo choice but to accept everything because you are right, hindi mo kasalanan kung bakit ako ganito. Ako. Kasalanan ko."
***
There's no such place as dumbridge in Makati okay? Product lang yun ng imagination ko kasi naka-krim stix ako hahaha.
