True colors (Tododeku)

Chapter 37 In which Deku falls apart multiple times

T.W. Dissociation, Alcohol, Mentions of Self Harm, and Derealization

Deku's POV-

Once Sho left, I hopped over to my computer. Earlier that day, I had managed to ask Momo for the tracker. She had questioned it initially, but after a lot of convincing, I had the tracker. The only problem left was to find crusty- that's where I came in. Because of Stain, I wouldn't have too much work to do.

For hours I scoured the internet in search of any footprints they may have left behind. It proved to be a dead end. There were no mentions of Tomura Shigaraki. Surely there had to be something online regarding the league. Otherwise, how would he amass a whole army for the USJ incident? I groaned and leaned back in my bed. It had been four hours since I started (it was now 12:30 a.m.), and I had not found anything. I pulled out my phone to text Stain.

Old Fart-

IA- Oi, can you at least give me a hint?

OF- Why are you up this late, kid?

IA- Cuz, you won't help me in finding this stupid base...

OF- Of course, this is a training exercise. As of right now, it poses no threat, so I'm gonna let you find it on your own.

I turned off my phone and threw it across the room. "Ugh," I rubbed my face. This wasn't going anywhere. I was frustrated and tired. I groaned and grabbed a jacket to go on a walk.

Carefully, I closed the door and went into the cool air. My hood was over my face, so I looked like a black blob in the night. I relished in the feeling nameless. Before I was adopted, there was no one. No one to be proud of me, no one to be disappointed in me, no one to cry for me. I was all alone. Now, I had a family that cared; it scared me.

I used my quirk and floated above our neighbourhood. A wave of adrenaline rushed through me as I noticed how high up I was. I smiled. I missed being alone. I loved my family, but this, I miss. Right then, I was a random person that no one knew. I let out a pleased sigh and fell.

I closed my eyes a felt the air push against me. I heard it scream in my ears as I pushed back.

I opened my eyes back up and gently floated down using my quirk. My heart was pounding in my chest, my hair was messed up, my hands were sweaty, I felt alive. Smiling, I flew back up again- higher than before. I paused for a second looking down at the road. It was so high up, but I didn't care- I needed this release. "One, two, three, and-" I released my quirk again and fell. Nothing mattered as I plummeted down.

Once again, I used my quirk to pick me back up, and I floated down softly. I pulled my hoodie down and ran my fingers through my wild hair. Feeling high on hormones, I ran away from the house and went into the city part of Musutafu. I prayed that no one would wake up anytime soon.

It took me an hour to get past the suburban part and into the actual city. Cars zoomed past me, unaware that I even existed. 'This feels nice,' I thought. I slipped into the shadows of the alleys. I knew this was dumb. My brain was yelling at me to stop, but I continued past the wasted alcoholics and hid from the people looking for a fight. This feeling was exhilarating. I wondered why I hadn't done it sooner. When I reached a dead-end I only jumped up onto the roofs.

I was able to see the whole city from there. 'So much life.' It was as if it was still daytime. I sat cross-legged on top of a medium height building.

After a while of watching the people below me, I stood up. I tiptoed on the edge of the building as if it were a tightrope. Once I had circled the whole building, I hopped down and entered one of the more shady bars. I slipped in by using my shadows to cover me. 'Maybe it will be the LOV's bar,' I snorted to myself.