You Make Life So Hard

Good Ideas

Summary: Toph's a genius. That's a fact.

AN: I do not own Avatar: The Last Airbender or anything else you recognize. short one tonight. enjoy!

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Toph has good ideas. (Sokka vehemently disagrees with this sentiment, but since when has anyone listened to what he thinks?) Uncle Iroh agrees with her.

In fact, he says this is one of her best ideas ever. She thinks so too.

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"Toph! Let us out of here! We are grown adults and you cannot-"

"Then act like it, Sugar Queen!"

"Toph, please, I will give you whatever you want. What do you want, a new title? A tournament in your honor? A wing of the pala-"

"No, Sunshine Prince. I want you two to get your heads out of your as-"

"Language! Toph, I swear to La, when I get out of here, I am going to whoop- OOF !" Toph cackled as she pushed the walls of her rock cage closer together so Katara would shut up. "Zuko, get your hands off-"

"It's not intentional, I promise! Just give me one second, okay? Toph! Get us out of here!"

"Stop hollering in my ear, Zuko."

"Hey, hey. The faster you two play kissy face, the faster I'll let you out." There was silence. Suki had read enough romance scrolls aloud (much to Toph's chagrin) for her to know exactly what was happening right now. Zuko had lit a flame and the two losers were looking deeply into each other's eyes, and realizing just how close they were, and looking at each other's lips, and oh boy, she could feel their hearts racing...

"TOPH!"

"Katara, do you mind? You're yelling in my face."

"Sorry, Zuko. It's just...why are we like this?"

"Because Toph told us she needed something, led us here, and trapped us in this rock box. I'm starting to get a little claustrophobic."

"That's not what I meant, stupid. I meant, why are we so close?"

"Again, Toph trapped us-" The earthbender heard Uncle Iroh slapping his forehead next to her and grimaced. With a twist of her wrist, she pushed the box's walls even closer.

"Zuko! I'm talking about-ouch!"

"Are you okay? Here, let me see. Ow, that looks bad. You're bleeding, Katara."

"Really? A rock piercing my skin looks bad and makes me bleed? Shocking!" Toph's eyes widened. My bad.

"Sorry, sorry. Let me see if I can pull it out, alright? You can squeeze my arm if it hurts too much." Well, well, well, if Grumpy wanted Sugar Queen to feel him up so much, he should've just said so! Good thing Toph was there to help these idiots.

"Um. Zuko? How much do you think it hurts to just pull a rock out of my arm? Why would I need to...squeeze your arm?" Yeah, okay, Katara. Like you don't want to.

"I wouldn't know. Just give me a second...and...alright! Got it out!"

"Thanks, Zuko." Then there was silence and Toph could feel their heartbeats going crazy again. Had they finally...

"What was that for?" Why did Zuko sound confused? Spirits.

"What? It was just a kiss on the cheek. Foreign dignitaries do it all the time."

Toph couldn't help herself. "Are you kidding me? A kiss on the damn cheek?"

"Hi, Toph! What's happening out here? What's up with the box?"

"Hey, Twinkletoes. Uh, nothing. Just storing some things in the box. Important things."

"Aang, thank Yue! Get us out of here! Please." Katara's desperation was easy to hear. Zuko's heart was still racing and he was silent.

Aang's feet turned to face Toph. "Toph? You put Katara in a box? What for?"

"I put Zuko in there too."

"Um, wha-oh. Gotcha. But still, how long have they been in there?"

"Not sure. But they found time to do surgery!"

"Surg-never mind. I don't want to know. I'm gonna let them out, okay?"

"No, Twinkletoes! They still have to-" She felt the box break and Zuko fall onto the ground. Where was Katara? Wait. Ah, there it was. Zuko's thudding heart was right on the ground, but just a little above it was Katara's heart beating rapidly in synchrony. Perfect. Once again, she knew they were realizing how close their bodies were, how perfect the other's lips were, how much they would like to kiss each other, and so on and so forth.

When, a whole two minutes later, she heard Twinkletoes clapping and Iroh muttering about grandbabies, she grinned. Her ideas were flawless.

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AN: heehee. fun to write. i love toph.

let me know your thoughts! thanks to lilredshortcake for reviewing <3

next chapter of You Knew It Was Me will be out tomorrow morning. in the meantime, if you like dark!Katara (with angsty Zutara), check out my one-shot 'i'll use you as a warning sign' on AO3/ff.net. I'd love to hear your opinions on it!