Where We Began

Liam Griffin

I feel like I'm dying painfully slow. I have the most uncomfortable boner after being around Hayden. It started when I had her against the lockers with my hand on her cheek. One side of my head was thinking with reason, while the other wasn't. Her big eyes, looking at me with curse words storming in her head.

The light above us contrasted against her. You can see her big forehead that I found cute. A million things I took notice of in the minute she lost control of herself. She readied her fire for me. Hayden's moments come out when she's vulnerable. The moments she lets the negative thoughts come out at others. I knew being gentle with her would calm her down.

There's no way you can fight fire with fire. I was glad she calmed down. Hayden is attractive, even if I am noticing the pointy flaws coming from her.

How can I not think about her the way I do?

God, all the things I could have done to her at that moment. Maybe, slide my hand down her skirt as I muffled her moans with my mouth. Or take her to the back of the school with the cold air hitting the heat between us.

I sat legs apart in Krispy Kreme because of my boner. I can't go to class in this state. The stall locked closed. I waited it out by scrolling on my phone. A game kept me busy for a few seconds when I heard the bathroom door swung open. It's two jocks from the basketball team. They didn't hear me at all.

"Hey, dude, did you hear about the fight with Thomas, and what's his name.." one of the jocks said.

"You mean Liam? That kid is a delinquent. I heard he won the fight, but that may have been by luck. We both know Thomas has always won," the other jock nonchalantly insulted me. I feel like a school girl peeking like this.

"I heard  Liam's family is loaded. His dad has been making a lot more than what they had before." One of the jocks zipped up their fly and started to wash their hands.

"Same thing I heard. Mostly, his older brother pulls all the weight. I remember when his mother came to chaperone a field trip," they bumped hands and started to laugh.

"That shit was hilarious. She didn't even know where she was. She was like, Where am I, where am I?" the two jocks put on a girl's voice. They laughed loudly at each other. The bathroom door closed. I wanted to kick this stall door down and beat their asses. They have no clue how hard it is from day today. It took them two minutes to talk about how bad my family is. They don't know.

My mother was oblivious to what was happening to her. She didn't know any of this would happen. The days didn't seem clear to her. The nights she woke up like a person in a stranger's house. I know that she knew me. That was never going to change.

I wouldn't let that illness have her lose me or West. They made fun of her to the point that I didn't want her showing up to school. I didn't want people knowing what she had. My father pretends to do the same thing. A whole fucking lie. That's what our family is.

"A fucking lie!" I slam open the stall door. I stared at myself. All I can think about is my father's words. He wants me to be more like him. I don't look like West. I don't talk like West. I'll never be West.

My hand runs through my hair to pull some strands. I walk out of the bathroom and to my next class. I'm only late by a minute. The hallways are empty. The janitors are mopping. I walk down the halls beating my hand on every locker to History class.

The classroom door opens for me when Mrs. Annsley sees me. "Look who it is. Liam Griffin, you're late," Mrs. Annsley waved me to a seat. Another time that I get a free pass. I'm sick of this shit. I drop my bag on the floor next to me. I leaned back to prepare for an hour-long lecture.