The Legend of the Jedi Queen

24. Lost Boys

When Nellith awoke, she felt so cold. Memories and a story that was as dark as the chamber pounded in her brain. She could feel him, could feel Snoke in her mind, could feel his withered hands in her skull.

She opened her eyes to see in the infirmary. Everything was too bright, she felt too plugged-in to the Force. She could feel the hum of the infirmary bed beneath her, and the sound of the medic machines felt like a roar. She squinted into the light, every color and dust more jumping out at her.

She couldn't help it, with the tumultuous presence in her head and the cacophony of her senses, she started to cry and writhe. She wasn't even aware that she was floating above the bed now. Everything felt too close, and she felt as if that clawed, withered hand was ripping her head open.

Footsteps shook the room, every vibration bouncing off of her bones. She could hear the sound as loud as thunder, of fairly new, well-made boots slapping down on the cold hard floor.

Then everything quieted. She felt a presence around her in the Force— it was like a rainy afternoon, cold and forlorn, but with the hope of something new. The sounds dimmed to white noise, all touch seemed far beyond her consciousness now, and the sight of everything blurred.

The hand that had been ripping into her brain, Snoke's presence, it all retreated for the new presence that took over all.

As if far away, she could feel a gentle push back down onto the infirmary bed. A hand then reached for the temple of her head, gently.

"This won't hurt, I promise," Tallis said.

Before Nellith could protest, ask, say anything, all went black once more, as the memories drifted away.

Nellith blinked. A white ceiling was above her, with its harsh, bright glow. She sat up, and saw the medic droids rolling around. She looked around her. She couldn't remember how she had gotten there or what had happened. She reached her hand to her head instinctively. She could feel a presence similar to rain, smelling earthy and feeling forlorn yet optimistic.

A medic droid rolled over.

"Where am I?" Nellith asked.

"The Uphatu Medical Center," the medic replied. "Mistress Jaina dropped you off earlier, a few hours ago. Nothing was physically wrong with you, but she claimed you were unwell."

"Was anyone here?" Nellith asked. She couldn't shake the feeling of absence surrounding her.

"No," the medic droid. "Although I do believe the Supreme Leader will be making a visit relatively soon."

"Alright," Nellith said. "Thank you."

"You are welcome, Mistress Nellith," the droid said, before rolling away.

Nellith shivered, and drew her knees up to her chest, and hugged herself. Something was very wrong, she could feel it.

She then felt a new presence in the Force— one she knew all too well. Her father was like the waves on Anch-To. Warm, friendly, loving, even, and fiercely protective. But darkness lingered under the surface, along with the threat of true power in a storm.

Her father's presence was among her favorite to feel in the Force. She saw him storm into the infirmary, looking angrier than she had seen him in a long time. His fiery lightsaber wouldn't have been out of place, right then and there.

His expression melted when he saw her. Tentative fear and love filled the air as he sat beside her, reaching a large hand out.

Nellith accepted it, and the two sat there a moment.

"How are you feeling?" he asked.

"Empty. Cold. I can't remember anything after entering the tomb," Nellith said. She turned to her father. "What happened?"

"You went in, and you found information about Snoke. . . And found a part of his spirit, or something like that in the tomb, and it took ahold of you," Ben said. "I have no idea why he's gone now."

"What were you going to do, to help me?" Nellith asked.

Ben bit his lip. "I would've tried to draw him into me. I know Snoke. I know his voice, I know how to handle it."

Nellith frowned. "I don't understand."

"Before I was born, Mother always said she felt a dark shadow, over me," Ben said. "Ever since I can remember. . . He was there. Until he died."

"Mum never explained exactly how or why you fell," Nellith said. "Was it because of Snoke."

"Part of it was," Ben said. "A lot of it was."

"Can you explain it to me?" Nellith begged. "I want to know."

"No, you don't." His voice was harsh. "I'm not proud of my story. And I wish it had never happened."

"Jaina said that she wished Grandma Leia had said something about Snoke earlier," Nellith said.

"Jaina needs to keep her mouth shut," Ben growled. "There is a reason we haven't told you about Snoke. But if you feel any part of him in you, you need to tell us. As soon as you can. Can you promise me that?"

"Yes."

Nellith couldn't help but think that she was making a lot promises, lately. Would they start to pile on, start to make more burdens to carry?

Ben hugged his daughter, and the two simply sat there, letting the silence overtake all.