The Legend of the Jedi Queen

34. Dark Journey

Once the Twin Suns leapt into lightspeed, Nellith left the cockpit to sit alone in the back, near the weapons locker. The events of the day kept replaying in her mind. She didn't even check to see what her scream had done to the troopers who had fallen to the ground.

Were they dead? Or just unconscious?

Both were still horrifying possibilities. She looked down to the magenta lightsaber in her hands. Was she even still worthy of it, if she'd slipped up this badly?

Over and over, she kept trying to justify it in her mind— but she always kept coming back to what she had done, what side of the Force she had tapped into, and how it felt. Thinking of how her scream made those troopers crumple, how it made them shatter, made her shiver. All that power. . . And she let it happen.

She let it all happen.

That was it, that was the thought that every single train led back to.

She heard footsteps and sensed a little fall of rain. Not the angry version, about to turn night into day with forked lightning, but the gentle kind, the kind that brought new life to Aquilae with the spring.

She looked up to see Tallis as he sat down beside her.

"Are you okay?" she asked him. "I'm sorry I let Aunt Jaina stuff you in a storage closet."

"I'm fine," Tallis said. "And we've got bigger problems to worry about."

"Andromeda, Snoke, and Abeloth are all one," Nellith said. "The leader of the Second Order is host to one of the most powerful Force entities to ever exist."

"Yeah," Tallis said. "And there's more coming."

Nellith regarded Tallis with reluctant suspicion. "You know a lot about this. And about my dreams. And the past."

"I do," he finally admitted. "I'm not ready to tell all of it, not yet."

"Why?" Nellith asked.

"It all runs together and I wonder sometimes if what I know is just something I dreamed up," Tallis said. "I need a little more time to figure it all out."

"When that happens, you'll tell me?" Nellith's voice was gentle, but there was vulnerability beneath the surface.

"I promise," Tallis said. He reached out to touch her hand, and she didn't pull away. In fact, she embraced him.

"Oh," was all he said. Nellith could feel that he hadn't been hugged in a very long time, in fact, not since his mother died on Corellia all those years ago.

"I'm sorry I pulled away," he said. "I'm used to being on my own, and I guess. . . "

He trailed off, beginning to cry. Nellith simply held him, knowing the power of an embrace all too well. Her parents had taught her that. She also knew the power of tears, and how they could change a life, how they could save a life.

She began to cry herself, although she didn't know entirely why. But the two sat in the escape pod, hugging each other and crying for all the reasons they could. This went on until Jaina entered the room, tear streaks down her face as well.

"I guess we're all unhappy, aren't we?" Jaina said, folding her arms over her chest.

Nellith and Tallis hastily broke apart, as Jaina sat next to them.

"I should never have taken you on such a critical mission," Jaina said. "We almost all died and we nearly lost two of our most critical Jedi in this war."

"What?" Nellith asked, as she swiped her tears away.

"Tallis is their Emperor, or they want him to be," Jaina said. "That makes him a necessary player in what's to come. As for you, Nellith. . . I think Rey should talk to you more about this, but as a Skywalker, you definitely have a significant role to play."

"But what about you?" Nellith asked. "You're Jaina Solo, Sword of the Jedi and all that. Doesn't that count for something?"

Jaina shook her head. "My generation's story is ending, yours is just beginning."

"But it isn't over yet."

Jaina looked to Tallis, surprised.

"The past keeps coming back," Tallis continued. "Even ancient things are coming back. You'll still be important. You're a Skywalker too, Jaina."

The Twin Suns was silent for a moment. Jaina tilted her head as her opinion on Tallis himself shifted.

"Thank you, Tallis," Jaina said. "I needed to hear that."

Tallis nodded, although there was a dark glimmer in his lilac-gray eyes when he looked to Jaina, as if he still hadn't forgiven her for the whole closet incident.

For a brief moment, Nellith wondered about the truth of Tallis's allegiance. Just because he hadn't accepted the offer of being an emperor to the Second Order didn't mean he wasn't Dark. As she watched him, she realized how little she truly knew about him.

Nevertheless, she wanted to believe in him.

Maybe that was why she said nothing at all, and ignored that glimmer.

When the Twin Suns set down in the hangar of the Imperial Palace, the sun had risen over the frozen planet, streaking the sky beautiful colors. Nellith rushed out, into her mother's arms.

She knew Rey could sense the darkness that had risen, once mostly dormant in her daughter, and now fully awake.

But details would be asked for later. Rey never cared about the darkness, as long as there was still light to meet it. So she and Ben embraced their daughter, accepting both the light and the dark within her that she had inherited from them.

Still, Tallis stood alone.