The Legend of the Jedi Queen

75. The Tragedy of Immortality

Nellith first headed into the bedroom within the Falcon and found some old clothes of Rey's that were dry and practical for fighting. She changed into them, and undid her elaborate braids, choosing to comb them out. But she hated how every yank was a thousand time amplified, every texture like a live wire on her skin. It was taking all of her strength not to cry.

How would she eat? How would she be able to sleep? How could she live this way?

"Do you want some help?"

Nellith turned, seeing Rey, and feeling a little ashamed she couldn't sense her approach with her new abilities.

"Come on, let's sit down and talk while Ben interrogates Tallis," Rey said.

"He won't hurt him, will he?" Nellith asked.

Rey blinked. "He betrayed your trust."

"No, he had a plan," Nellith realized. "He was planning what he did from the moment he sent that transmission."

"What plan?" Rey asked.

Tallis sat next to the dejarik table, with his hands cuffed at Ben's insistence. Ben now paced the floor, trying to think of what to say, what questions to ask.

"Would you like for me to just tell you what happened?" Tallis was amused by Ben's panic. Seeing someone who used to be such a powerful servant of the dark— what was happening to him?

"No. Yes." Ben turned hastily, crossing his arms over his chest. "What happened on Mortis?"

"Abeloth was looking for her children, but they died a long time ago," Tallis said. "I knew she'd want to make us her new children, she did it before when she took Snoke's body. I would be the Dark, and Nellith would be the Light. If we both had godlike powers, I knew we could both take her."

"How'd that work out?" Ben asked sarcastically.

"Not as well as I would've liked," Tallis said, instantly irritated. "But I had no other choice."

"If you'd asked Nellith, she would've figured out a better way out," Ben said. "My daughter's intelligent. And whatever you two did, it took away something that was a part of her."

"And made her immortal and invulnerable," Tallis added.

"Oh Force, you mean she's going to live forever like this?" Panic rose in Ben's voice. "Can't you see that she's suffering?"

Tallis bit his lip to keep himself from doing something stupid. He had to wait, he had to play the game that Nellith would want him to. . . Yet it hammered in his head again and again. He knew she was suffering and it was his fault. Her suffering was what had gotten him into this mess in the first place. She was the weakness he never stopped needing.

"I know that," he said. "I never wanted—"

"Do you even know what you want?" Ben asked, his voice dangerously low.

Tallis rose up like the flames of rage in his heart. "Listen, I've told you what happened. We've got bigger problems, like what we're going to do to make sure Abeloth can never hurt her ever again— or anyone!"

That last statement slipped out from that small bit of Light left in him, still protesting what was happening.

Ben's expression faltered with his sympathy. "We'll figure out how to undo this."

"He saved you," Rey said. "But at the cost of making everything unbearable to you."

"There's still something good left in him," Nellith said. "I miss the Dark Side. The balance. . . It's gone. I want it back, so badly. I feel empty."

Rey's features became sympathetic as she tried to fathom what her child must have been going through.

"It's going to be okay," Rey promised. "We are going to fix this."

Suddenly, Nellith perked her head up.

"What's wrong?" Rey asked.

"Tallis is about to do something really stupid," Nellith said, standing up. "Light has to temper the Dark."

Before Rey could question her further, Nellith raced out of the room as Tallis stood up, and used the Force to completely shatter the cuffs. She placed a hand on Tallis's arm, and he visibly deflated. No words passed between them, for she knew what had happened. She stepped forward.

"Are we returning to Uphatu, Dad?" Nellith asked.

"Yes," Ben said, his eyes lingering on his daughter's unnaturally serene expression. "Are you okay?"

"No," Nellith admitted. "But we've got bigger things to worry about. We need to start planning our attack."

"Talk to Jaina," Ben said. "She's been organizing the Jedi."

"Good," Nellith said. "We've got to end her now. Abeloth's going to escape that planet, it's only a matter of time."

"Good thing we should be just about there," Rey called as she entered the cockpit or the Millennium Falcon. That left Ben, Nellith, and Tallis awkwardly staring at each other, none of them knowing quite what to say.