Big girls don't cry (Aleida series #1)

12. Unexpected arousal

Aleida's POV

I can't believe it! My wolf is inside me; she exists, she is mine! I jump up and down over the new feeling of togetherness. My joy spreads throughout the room while my brothers, Killian and Miliano, are smiling big at me.

They understand how big this is for me. They all probably met their wolves when they turned sixteen, as most others do. My happiness spreads even more when I hear Lisa inside our shared mind.

It's great to be able to talk to you; finally, Aleida, I've been waiting for the wall you set up between us to fall.

Did I set up a wall between us? Oh, moon goddess, I'm sorry!

It's okay, sweetheart. I'm here now, and I'm a part of you. There's something I need to talk to you about.

What is it?

You have to let go.

Let go of what?

Your walls you have up there block both your feelings and anyone who tries to get close to you. It's not the best way to handle it. It would be best to process all the pain, sadness, and betrayal you have experienced during your short life. Otherwise, it will eat you from the inside... and stop yelling at our mate!

I'm hanging down my head. I can hear someone say, "it looks like she's getting scolded by her wolf."

I didn't yell at him....

Well, you have, and you are very well aware of that too. You don't have to be strong all the time; mate wants to help you, let him do it. He's happy when you are happy; even if he hasn't left his mark on you yet, he can still feel your emotions from time to time. You have been begging and praying to the moon goddess all your life that she will send someone who wants to help you. Now you have him in front of you, and you deny him that.

"I don't know how to talk about it ... " I say out loud to her.

I know it's hard, but if you don't tell him about the darkness inside you, you'll perish. No one can make it all alone in this world unharmed. You have had to fight for your survival all your life, but you have also forgotten to live during that time. Promise that you live your life the way you want to live; you have neglected yourself and your joy long enough.

"Thank you," I say out loud with a smile before she turns off the link.

When the fog disappears from my eyes, I can see my new family sitting in front of me, looking at me with joy.

"Welcome back, luna," Killian says.

"Did you get scolded?" Nathan asks, laughing.

I stick my tongue out to him, and both of my brothers laugh at me. I sit back in Miliano's lap and relax in his arms immediately.

"So, was it a friendly chat with your wolf?" Miliano asks.

"Yes, it opened my eyes a little."

"What's her name?"

"Lisa."

"Hmm ..." he says, and I can feel the vibrations in his chest.

"What?" I ask.

"Nothing, that just explains why Ryan has said the name 'Lisa' since we found you. He has repeatedly said that we have to get Lisa out, but every time I asked him about it, he ignored the question. Why did she yell at you?"

"Because I didn't tell you about my dark thoughts."

I can feel him stiffen, and every person's gaze in the room lands on me.