Broken Chances- AU Tubbo SBI

Chapter 3~ Letter

"Technoblade, you did what now?" Phil asked during supper that night. "Well, you know I severely dislike children. The only thing I dislike more than children are orphans. What was I supposed to do?" Techno responded. Phil put his head in his hands and sighed. 

"If you'd like to know, today's event inspired me to write a song." Wilbur said. "I do something as simple as trip and you go and write an entire song about it. Of course you do." I sighed, resting my head on the table. Wilbur ran upstairs and came back with his guitar. "This one's for my dumb brother Tubbo!" Wilbur yelled. Phil gave him a warning look, but I knew he was trying his best not to laugh.

"I think the entire population of this town 
Will never forget
In a thousand years you will be hearing 
About this day you regret
The legend of the clumsiest person
This town had ever saw
They think his name might be Tubbo
But they truly know nothing at all

Is his family cruel for laughing, 
Or do they just have a good sense of humor
Is the whole town cruel for laughing
Don't worry, the bump on his head isn't a tumor
Honestly, the whole thing was bloody funny

So much for not making a show
Tubbo"

I covered my head in embarrassment "I'm never tripping again." Was the only response I could think of. "Wooooo! Pop off, Wilby!" Tommy cheered. "I think you gave me goosebumps." Techno stated sarcastically. "Great song, Wilbur. I'm a little concerned about your choice of lyrics, but I can get over that." Phil said. "Wait until you hear the one about his internet girlfriend!" Tommy exclaimed. "He's making stuff up, typical Tommy, you know?" Wilbur said, his voice full of worry. "I'll keep an eye on you, Wilbur." Phil said jokingly. He clearly thought watching his children fight was funny. 
                              
                              ***

I had been staring at myself in the mirror for 30 minutes now. I know I should have been asleep, but I couldn't stop thinking about the goat (or was he a ram, more specifically?) man. Why did he look so painfully familiar? My ears did kind of resemble his, and my horns were starting to curl, was there a chance he was a family member or something? "No, that can't be. If it was, he definitely wouldn't recognize me." I whispered to myself. I looked at myself again. "Riiiiiight, the horns and stuff." I whispered again.

Someone knocked on the door, making me jump, and I accidentally knocked over half the things on the sink counter. "Tubbo, are you in there?" Phil asked from the other side of the door. "Yes! I'm coming!" I said, scrambling to fix the sink counter. I opened the door to see a very worried Phil. "Tubbo, let's sit down and talk." Phil said. I nodded nervously. 

"Tubbo, is there anything else bothering you beside your horns? I know there has to be something else to this." Phil asked calmly. "Well… Phil, do you know anything about my parents?" I asked nervously. "Actually, I have something I should have shown you a long time ago." He got up, heading for the storage in the basement. I started to follow, but he told me to stay where I was.

He came back with an envelope. It had clearly already been opened. "This was at the bottom of the box we found you in. It's about time you read it." Phil told me. I started to open it, but he stopped me. "I'll let you open it in private. You know you don't have to open it if you don't want to. You can always come back and talk to me later." He gave me a quick hug, and stood up. As he headed back to his room, I sat in complete shock. 

I headed back to my room, holding the envelope as gently as possible. When I got to our room, Tommy was fast asleep, snoring on the top bunk of our bed. I got in my bed, turned on the light beside it, and sat there staring at the envelope. As much as I wanted to know about my biological family, I was scared to open the envelope. "Better now than never." I encouraged myself. 

The envelope was so fragile. It probably wasn't good quality to begin with, but it was old. I was probably around two or three when I joined this family, and that was around 10 years ago. As I pulled out the old piece of paper, my nerves skyrocketed. I was finally going to find out about my family. At first glance, the writing looked like it was in a different language, but then I realized it was just very messy handwriting. 

I had always had a lot of trouble reading things, clearly Phil did not think this through when he gave me the letter. 

……… this ….. a good family, ……. that can take care of .. …… Tubbo.

My head hurt after reading one sentence. The handwriting mixed with the bad lighting, plus my struggle reading, made it extremely hard to decipher what the letter said. I could have waited for later, but there was no way I could sleep without reading this letter.

He's better off ……. me as a father. I don't have the ………… to take care of him. For background information, I'm ………. drunk. I probably am right now, to be …… . I never wanted a child. His mother left me ……. after he was born, leaving me with a baby I ……. take care of. His entire short life I have ignored him, ….. showing him the love he needs. I …… don't have enough money to …. …. of him. I know ………. him isn't the right thing to do, but anything is better than having him grow up with me as a father. He loved bees, this plushie is one of the only …... I will have given him. I might be throwing my life away, but I'm not throwing his life away.

Sincerely, 

The signature was crossed out, but I didn't care that I would never know his name. I was crying. I put the letter back in the envelope as good as I could. I truly wasn't ready for this. I tucked the letter under my bed, and hid under the covers. I definitely wasn't ready for this. I probably never would have been. I was shaking now. 

"Tubbo?" I heard Tommy say, muffled by my covers and my sniffles. I didn't respond. I heard him climb down the ladder. He tried to yank the blanket off me, but it got caught on my horns. I cried out as I was thrown to the floor. "Tubbo! I'm so sorry!" Tommy cried. He tried to untangle me from the blanket, inaudibly mumbling. "T-Tommy, I'm f-fine!" I said shakily. "You clearly aren't. And it's not only because I just pulled you off your bed. Uh, sorry about that… again." Tommy's voice was also shaking. 

When I didn't say anything, Tommy decided to keep talking. "I woke up to the sound of you crying. I waited a little bit, but I couldn't take it anymore. I was going to maybe try and comfort you or something, but, uh, I definitely made it worse. Did something happen?" I didn't respond. "You don't have to tell me anything. If there is something you do want to tell me, you can. If you don't that's fine." Tommy kept on rambling, but I stopped listening. I didn't want to talk to Tommy about this, it was my problem, not his. 

Tommy shook me. "Tubbo, are you still in there?" He practically shouted. When my voice didn't work, I just nodded slightly. I knew Tommy was staring at me, but I continued to look down at the floor. All of the sudden, our door creaked open. "What is going on here? Tommy, did you break Tubbo?" Techno asked. I looked up to see Techno and Wilbur standing in the doorway. 

"I think I might have." Tommy said. "N-no, it's fine. Well, he did pull me off my bed." I said, faintly laughing. "Tubbo is really racking up those bruises." Tommy joked. "Tubbo, you have a blanket on your head." Wilbur reminded me. I went to pull it off, but somehow it was stuck. Tommy started to laugh beside me. "What is it now?" I asked. "Tubbo, I think your horn thing poked through it!" Tommy exclaimed. He grabbed the blanket, and slid it off. "Look at this!" Tommy shoved the blanket in front of my face, showing me the big rip in it. I didn't find it as funny as he did.

"Was there… anything else going on here?" Techno asked. "Nope! I just wanted to wake up Tubbo to talk, and then all this happened!" Tommy lied, looking right at me as he talked. I mouthed "thank you", hoping no one else would notice. Wilbur seemed convinced, but Techno didn't. "Welp, we should all really be getting back to bed!" I interrupted. I stood up, and Tommy followed. I walked over to the door, and tried to push Techno and Wilbur out of the room. "Bye, we really need to get back to bed!" I said. 

Wilbur waved goodbye, but Techno's look scared me a little bit. He clearly knew something else was up, but I knew he would never directly ask about it. I shut the door, sighing. I turned to face Tommy. "You're welcome." he said. We didn't speak any more that night.