Her first time preview.

2

Dear diary. 

Last night was a rough night and it all started when Logan called me in the middle of the night. Asking me if I wanted to come over because it was urgent. When I came there it was Justin. He was drunk and angry about his dad marying Logan.  He made a big mess. Logan called me to talk to him because he thought Justin would listen to me, which I doubted but I tried it anyway. Justin was his drunk and mean self, and I soon started to regret coming here. But I do care for him and I  want to know what happened and be there for him, even when he is mean to me most of the time.  When he saw me he didn't seem too happy about it and he tried to make me leave with his harsh words. Which this time, didn't work. I stayed and tried to talk to him. Then we got into an argument, which is nothing new, but in my anger, I pushed him and the bottle fell and he fell I jumped after him cause he wasn't moving, but turns out he was just messing with me. We laughed and had this short moment of intimacy. Then later as dumb as I am I cut my hand on the glass of the scotch bottle while I tried to clean it up. Justin jumped by my side and took care of the cut in the bathroom,  Logan came in to check on me and I hope he didn't saw our intimate moment in the pool. I know he and Justin don't like eachother and I don't want to lose a friend because of my bond with him. Justin as the ass he is was rude and dragged me up to his room. At least I assume it is his, it's so clean and I can see no one has ever stayed here. He was looking for some dry clothes when I told him I wanted to go. He got angry again, but his anger slowly faded away when he looked at me. We talked and got into another fight about me not wanting to stay and him not finishing his sentences. I hate it when he does that. I feel like he doesn't trust me or is holding something back that I need to know. Then when he told me I got to see this other side of him which didn't surprise me. I knew he had another side deep down behind all the darkness he carries with him. I saw him, I saw the true Justin without the anger, sadness, and guilt he carries around. That side quickly went away, but I decided to stay. Justin got me some of his clothes which were way too big for me. This thing sleeping with a boy in the same bed was all new to me. I also think I have to get used to sleeping with Justin since I have already done that two times since I met him. My breathing begins to quicken the moment he touches me. And we had this moment when I thought it's going to happen. But instead, he stopped and asked me if I was okay.  And now I'm glad he noticed that I hadn't done anything cause if he didn't I would have to go through with it. And I know that if I did I would never forgive myself. I'm not myself when I'm with him. Lucky for me he respected it and told me we have time. Now that sounds weird coming from his mount. We just slept that night until, I woke up and he wasn't in the bed next to me. I found him sitting at the window seat. I tried to talk to him, which I shouldn't have done. He got so angry that it scared me and I couldn't leave any faster then I did. He new aceactly what to say to hurt me and he did it well. And the worst part is he never came after me that night. I knew this would happen and I regret letting him in.