Chapter Seven

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My family is already inviting people for my birthday party. I'm a hundred percent against celebrating it publicly. Just Anne and my family would do perfectly, but Mom argued that 18th birthdays should be grand. So many people it is. I hate people.

After me and my little brother got home that night, I managed to get a hold of Anne's attention for a long amount of time. She answered one of my calls quickly and we had a couple of hours of conversation on the phone. She said she cannot wait to get here and to see me in person. The nervousness I felt yesterday sounds so silly now that I knew why she couldn't text me right away. Anne was busy asking for a ride from a friend of hers. I find her more charming because she's willing to go to that much trouble just to visit me. Who wouldn't be smitten by her?

While I was still in daydream mom asked me to go around our street and start inviting people even though my birthday is six days away. I was like, why don't you do it yourself you're the one who wants this. Then she full on ranted on me saying she gives roof above my head, and I would starve without her, and I couldn't even do a simple task for her while she gave me my life. Why does all moms sound the same? Like it wasn't their choice to have a freaking family. I always knew since I was little I don't want a family when I grow old. That shits scary. Living the same life repeatedly sounds horrifying.

I got upstairs to my room saying I'll go houses to houses later. My room isn't the greatest. Socks and shirts all over the place even at the top of the cabinet. Looking at this makes me feel light headed. I don't have curtains yet and the sunlight penetrated my room revealing this garbage mess. It looks like someone burglarized in here then they found out I'm broke and started thrashing my shit everywhere. I should be ashamed, the whole neighborhood might've already seen this. But what could I do? I'm a dirty girl wink wonk.

I grabbed my bluetooth speaker and played "Ain't it fun" by Paramore. You already know I'm turning 18 next week. Gonna be living in the real world that doesn't sound so fun, or it could be. I'll know when the time comes.

I picked up the dirty clothes on the floor and shoot them on the laundry basket. Three points! But a lone sock flew to the window beside my bed. I came to pick it up and opened the windows as well to let the fresh afternoon air in. Little did I know my biology teacher was blow drying her short hair just across my room. The smell of her sweet floral-scented shampoo flew right to my window and into my nostrils. Now I smell nothing but it.

Watching her, I remembered what happened yesterday with Chelsea and her sudden questioning. It just doesn't make sense to me. Maybe I'm trying to give it a deeper meaning when in fact it isn't that much of a concern. But the look on Chelsea's face though, it's concerning...

I just brushed it off and thought of how much a coincidence this is. Her room is just across mine. She's the first one I would invite out of all the neighbors actually. And this situation would just make it easier.

Ms. Miller noticed me looking at her and she smirked. "See something you like?" She asked raising a brow.

"What the hell, you're my teacher!" I laughed then shook my head.

"I'm joking, I don't flirt with kids." She puts down her blow dryer and turned to face me. She was wearing the same green silk robe she was wearing the first time I saw her in her house. "So what are you up to?"

I rolled my eyes at her embarrassing remark and responded, "I'm turning 18 next week so technically, I'm no kid anymore."

"Is that so? I'm sorry in advance," She sipped coffee from a mug. That's the mug that I gave her. It's nice to see her using it.

"Why?"

"Because you're going to be an adult Ellie. Every adults regret being an adult. Even Hayley Williams said it ain't fun."

"No. She said, Ain't it fun? So it's a question."

"Well as an adult I could answer for her, it's not."

Why is she so serious? I got back to picking up clothes and shooting them to the bin while jamming to my favorite band. Ms. Miller had the nerve to request a song too. How bold of her. But anyway, we hummed to the song and danced our heads a little when it comes to the catchy parts. It's good to be around people who appreciates your choice in music.

We're like those two neighbors in Taylor Swift's You Belong With me music video, except she's my teacher and that-that's kinda weird y'all...

"So what is Ms. Miller up to today, are you just gonna do your make up? It's been an hour."

"Sorry for taking too long I'm perfecting my eye liner." Her hand shakes when she applied it to her lids. It's hilarious to see her struggle and start from scratch all over again. "Curse caffeine for screwing my make up," She sighed and once again attempted to draw perfectly. Ms. Miller finally took a break at it as she shakes her hand praying it'll make her fingers relax more. "I'm going on a date if you're curious. So pray it goes well."

"I pray that the poor guy won't be scared away."

"We'll see who's scared if I'm late to school tomorrow Ellie." She closed one of her make up tablets and looked at the mirror for blemishes.

"I am speechless."

She stood up from her make-up table grinning and from then on I was left to listen to music alone. I don't want to admit it but, having company is better than this. It was less serious. Less room for thoughts preventing it from overflowing out of me and I could not control it.

When you're alone, you're just with your mind. And my mind isn't the best place in the world. It sucks in here. I'm having debates and conversations with different versions of myself. Sometimes, I thought of how I don't really have friends but my girlfriend. So sorry, no funny duo or squads in here...

What the fuck have I been doing in highschool? Isn't that suppose to be the most memorable part of your life because you're so reckless and free? I just remember skipping classes and hanging out with myself shaking school vending machines so I'll have free sodas. While I was vandalizing a school's property, Anne was busy attending school as we both should, she's trying to live out to her parent's unreachable expectations. She's doing something productive and I, I could never match that...

I turned off my bluetooth speaker after I cleared my room. My ear didn't hear anything but silence. This ringing in my ear, silence could never really be silent huh? Is there even real silence? I'm switching to conspiracy theorist mode.

I headed to my closet to pick an outfit best suited for inviting people to come to my party. I picked a modest long white skirt and a lavander shirt. I think I look cute, no scratch that, I am fucking adorable they have no choice but to come to my birthday party.

As I've told, I don't have friends. I don't have anyone to invite but my girlfriend. Even at my old town I barely get along with anybody but Anne, we started as bestfriends and ended up as lovers. Never really thought of expanding my relationship with anybody else. So at my party I will be expecting to see a bunch of strangers and also a bunch of family members. Cool right?

I headed to the door and let mom know I'm already leaving. I practiced my smile on my bathroom mirror whenever I have the time and I'm good to go.

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