Phoenix Fire

5 - Forbidden Paradise

KAENA

"Gaius changed your dressing while you were asleep." Merlin informed me. We were sitting on my bed. It had taken me a little while to calm down from my dream. It had all felt horribly real, but that's the way with nightmares; it's why they're so terrifying. There's that one moment at the very end where you realise none of this can be real, that you must be somewhere deep inside your head, but you can't open your eyes. But eventually you can. Your eyes open. You're safe. 

Or as safe as you can be while under the curse of an evil witch who wants to find you and do God knows what to you. 

"He said something about stitching it up when you woke up." Merlin added. I remained silent. I felt I had just been run over by a cart, my entire body felt weak and heavy. That being said my arm felt a lot better.

Merlin cleared his throat, "Arthur said something about coming to see how you were doing. I think he wants to make sure you're doing alright."

I looked down at my hands. I swept my thumb across the crease in my finger tips; a reminder of all the times I'd strung a bow. I sighed. Everything felt strange now. Since Hale had died my entire life felt like I was daydreaming. Everywhere I went my head felt hazy and the world looked out of kilter. 

"Look," Merlin twisted slightly to face me, "I know he's a pompous arrogant ass, but that doesn't make him a bad person."

"He's not arrogant to me because he knows my heritage. I'm a woman of supposedly high birth. I don't like the way he treats other people." I replied. I'd heard townsfolk and villagers say he could be arrogant, servants who had moved away from Camelot said he was demanding, even the way he spoke to Merlin, who I'd found out was his manservant, wasn't great. He'd made Merlin walk back to Camelot instead of giving up his own horse. If you can't treat everyone properly, regardless of birth, then it shows how you really feel. That being said, he was a prince. He's been taught since birth that he's superior. 

Merlin shrugged. "He's not all bad. A few weeks back he stood up for me in front of Uther, in front of the whole court in fact." 

"He did?" This was news. From what I'd heard Arthur would follow his father's every word.

"Yes," Merlin went on, "he does really enjoy giving me the worst jobs he can come up with though. I don't even want to think what they must be feeding those horses." He grinned. I smiled a little and let my shoulders relax a bit. 

"I have to go now," he told me, "but Gaius should be back soon. He seems to think you're healing up well." 

"That's good. I'm sorry if I worried you earlier." I was embarrassed honestly. I would normally hate for anyone to see me in such a weak position but I had little choice. "I guess I'll see you later?"

"Well you're sleeping in my bed so I'd assume so." The bed lifted slightly as he got up. As soon as I heard his door close I took out my pendant, and started tracing the intricate carving on it. 

"Free like a bird. That's what your new name should be." 

"What, my name should be bird? Hale that is the worst name you could come up with. Good afternoon your Lordship, here is the prisoner you requested, oh by the way this is my partner she's called Bird."

"No you idiot. Lona. Your name should be Lona. It means free person. Magnificent birds were born to fly, not sit in cages. You were born to be free like them, not spend your whole life looking pretty in gowns you can't even run in. Your purpose in life isn't to simper at rich men and be paraded around on their arm like some fucked up trophy, before you propel babies out of you at an alarming rate. You are meant to fly Kae. To be free."