I'm Yours

Chapter eight

This isn't me.

I'm not weak.

This isn't real.

This isn't me.

This isn't me, I'm not myself.

It had been days since my encounter with Andrew. I haven't talked to anyone, not Colt or Clara, since. My wounds were healing up nicely and quickly because of the Alpha blood running through me. I healed much more quickly than Mark. I guess that's a good thing, it just puts off our match a little longer. I still had my ribs cracked though, and my wounds were just starting to close up, but I was expected to heal much more earlier than planned, or so says Clara.

She had been worried about me lately. She would feed me and help me bathe. She was like a real sister to me. I really appreciated how she never asked why i was this way. Maybe she never asked because she already knew.

Maybe heart-ache was such an obvious emotion.

Good news was since there was no more risk of me popping my ribs out of place, i could move on my own again.

I had been thinking about Mark lately, and how he was holding up. Clara says that he was conscious but he still couldn't move. He was healing much more slowly than I was, even if he still had abnormal healing abilities, much more than regular wolves.

I know what Andrew said about me and him re-matching, but i still wanted to apologize. What he saw wasn't me. I was always taught how to suppress my wolf. But with all the stuff that has happened lately, Could you blame me?

But still, I plan to honour the way my mom and dad raised me. So that meant apologizing. Even if he did hate my guts. I still had to try. I would be dishonouring my mother and father if i didn't. I just don't want it to be on my conscience if i end up dying or something. I mean i was rouge.

As my mind was thinking about this, it was really only a front. I just wanted to distracted myself. On the inside i was trembling. I've never been afraid before. I've never been scared of the future nor have I ever had anything to fear. But I was afraid, very afraid.

I kept fumbling with the sheets, and kept sweating. I felt like a hollow shell.

What was I supposed to do?

I've never been afraid before...

This isn't me.

This isn't real.

This is not me.

I am not weak

I felt the undeniable toward Andrew. It was strong . It was there and I felt it. How was i supposed to get rid of it quickly? I wanted, no needed him. I was all alone. I had no one to rely on. I never really understood what mates felt. Why they were so close all the time, always touching. It was slowly becoming a living hell with Andrew not around. My body burned, my mind was consumed on only him. Everything was about him, about Andrew.

It hurt...

I was hurting...

Mom...

Dad...

Help me please...

Guide me...

I need you...

I carefully slid out of the bed with a heavey heart, and aching limbs that i couldn't even feel. I was that out of it. I already knew where i was going. His sent was strong, I could have spotted it anywhere.