Embracing the Sea's Sadness (Amidst Solitude #1)

Chapter 32

Chapter 32

Paubaya

"Sigurado ka ba, anak? You are five months pregnant now, hindi ba pwedeng dumito ka na lang muna? We can go to Ilocos Norte after you give birth," bakas sa boses ni Mommy ang pag-aalala nang sabihin iyon sa akin.

I told her I want to go to Ilocos Norte to visit the place. One week of staying there isn't bad, right? After all, I also missed the place. I wanted to breathe too. This place is a little bit toxic for me.

A smile plastered on my lips when I remembered Tita Edra. I hope she's still doing fine. Marami na siguro siyang naging anak-anakan doon sa apartment niya. She was kind and very helpful to me when I was still living in their apartment.

Ngunit nawala 'yon nang maisip si Aubert. Naging toxic lang naman lalo ang Davao sa'yo nang magpakita si Aubert, Leigh.

Ipinilig ko ang iniisip at tumingin kay Mommy. She was standing near the landscape of Aurora Park while staring at me. Napangiti ako nang makita sa gilid n'on ay ang isang mahabang mesa, kung saan nakalagay ang urn ni Daddy.

I smiled as if his death didn't almost kill me. If Daddy's here, would he be happy to see me? But if he's here, I wouldn't get pregnant. May plano talaga ang Diyos para sa akin. After Dad passed away, God gave me a blessing to cherish forever.

Indeed, we should always rely on God's will. Hindi niya tayo pababayaan kahit na anong mangyari. So, to those people who have heavy problems, I pray to God to give them strength and the will to keep going. It's not easy, but it will all be worth it. Just trust God's process.

Muli akong tumingin kay Mommy. "Y-Yes, Mom. Don't worry too much about me. May kakilala naman po akong pwede kong puntahan doon. I know she could help me," nakangiti kong sabi sa kanya.

Mommy sighed as she went near me. Napanguso ako nang bahagya niyang ituro ang medyo malaki nang tiyan.

"H-Hindi mo pa rin ba ipapakilala sa akin ang ama ng anak mo?"

I slowly shook my head and turned my gaze at Daddy's urn. Napapikit ako nang mariin nang maramdaman ang paggalaw ng puso ko.

It's been three months since I last saw Aubert. Hindi ko man sabihin ngunit alam kong inayawan na niya ako. He doesn't want me anymore. Ipinagtabuyan ko siya. I rejected his heart when in fact I shouldn't do that to him.

I am becoming heartless and a pain in the ass right now.

For Pete's sake, my hasty decision still benefits him somehow! Magsama sila ng babae niya roon sa Paris!

It seemed like I was triggered by just the thought of his woman. Naramdaman ko ang pagkunot ng noo ko bago tumingin kay Mommy. Bahagya pa itong nagulat nang makita akong masama na ang timpla.

"M-Mommy naman! Mabubuhay pa rin naman kami ng anak ko kahit wala siyang kikilalaning ama. It's as if he is a good person!" hindi mapigilang bulyaw ko kay Mommy.

Napanguso ako nang magulat ito't napahawak pa sa dibdib para pakalmahin ang sarili.

"For Pete's sake, Leigh! Y-You and your mood swings will be the death of me!" nailing na sita niya sa akin at pabiro pang tinampal ang balikat ko.

"Just go to the company, Mommy. I can take care of myself now," sandali akong napatigil bago hinaplos ang tiyan ko.

"Right, baby? Mommy can take care of herself now, so grandma shouldn't worry now, right?" pakikipag-usap ko pa roon.

Narinig ko ang pagsinghap ni Mommy bago 'to napapailing na tumayo.

"Okay! Just one week, Leigh. Kapag hindi ka nakauwi rito pagkatapos ang one week, hindi ako magdadalawang-isip na ipahanap ka sa Ilocos Norte!" halos sumisigaw na sabi ni Mommy sa akin.