The Lines Between Us | ✔

|.27.|

September 25th, 11:45 am,

Bella

''How are you feeling?'' I hear Ash's voice question from outside the room. I look up slowly to see him leaning against the doorframe, elbow pressed against the solid wood. His face looks softer than usual — like he's happy about something, though the slight smirk would say otherwise.

''Good, I guess'' I reply softly, turning my head back down to the book I am reading. It's not that interesting, but takes my mind off what happened. It's been four days now. I just can't rid it from my mind. Every time I talk to somebody — the hundreds of people that come up to me every day in college, the streets, everywhere — the image just comes back. Like a waterfall. A waterfall I can't control. They don't care about me; just trying to relieve themselves of the not knowing. Even the teachers do it. 

I have Jackson now, though. He also gets it, the chatter, though he's not much on the receiving end, like me. He doesn't get talked about as much as I do, so he scares them off. We've become close these past few days, and I realized that when I am with him, I don't think about it. Like he's a memory blocker. I like it. The pain doesn't linger.

The first day he stayed with me at school, the day after the incident, I didn't fall asleep to the sound of my own tears. He hasn't stayed over (Ash wouldn't dare let him) but the thought of having a friend is soothing.

He steps forward into the room. ''Are you ready to pick Josh up?''

I nod in response. I can't wait for him to get back from the hospital. Just to be able to know he's okay. It took longer than I expected for him to be released, but considering her got shot, maybe not too long. I visited a few times, as many as I could truthfully; I missed the visiting slots a lot. I got my drug test back, too — negative for everything. I wasn't surprised, though. Losing weeks of memory, and it all coming back was a big giveaway. They weren't as bad as I suspected. I imagined my time to be grotesque and violent, but I miscalculated the number of positive things that happened. 

I remember what it was like meeting Ash for the first time. I hate myself for what happened to me, I lost a relationship because of Liam. It isn't like Ash ever asked me out, but the idea was there. We both knew it. I still feel excited every time I see him, the way I imagine love to be, but how can I be certain? I see the way he looks at me. Like he never wants to tear his eyes away. I do the same, but I don't know if he notices or not. I'm always waiting for the right time, but I don't want to make him uncomfortable.

My finger curls the top right-hand corner of my book page into a small, triangular crease. ''What time should we set off?'' I place the book down next to my leg. Lift my head to give Ash my full attention.

''Twelve?''

''I don't know, you tell me,'' I laugh. It's true though. I realized when my memories came back, that I never really left campus. And if I did, I wasn't aware of my wherabouts.

''Twelve it is, then,'' He settles. Turns his head to my book. ''What are you reading?'' I can tell her has no interest in literature whatsoever.

''Nothing important,'' I confess, my smile broadening. Folding my arms up over my head, I lay back on Ash's bed.

I hear his feet step over to the bed. ''Oh, are you sure about that?'' He laughs, snatching the book up. I smile, propping myself up via my elbows, staring as he assesses the front cover.

He glares at it with beady eyes, then wrinkles his forehead in confusion. ''Dinosaurs?''

''What? No!'' I exclaim, launching myself off the bed and nudging him out of the way. My hands grab the book from his. I analyze the cover, trying to remember the contents. ''There's no dinosaurs-'' My eyes trail up to his grinning face.