Hey You!'s POVIt wasn't the first time someone got mugged in Gotham, or the last. The only special thing was that it was my first time seeing one. Yay. Someone bring me a cupcake to congratulate me.
Or a pipe. Or plank. Or sword. Or atomic bomb.
Nah, I'm just kidding about that last one. But seriously, I'm getting tired of having bloody fists. Do you know how hard it is to cook?
So, back to my not so lovely or amazing ordeal. Which I forgot to mention in the beginning, so let me give you a brief summary.
Guy walks into the alleyway next to my house. (His first mistake.) Guy gets cornered by thugs. (Had no idea that was going to happen in the middle of lower Gotham.) Guy punches thugs. (His second mistake.) Thugs punch back. (What a surprise.) Guy is outnumbered. (You don't say?)I feel bad. (How unusual.)
Note to self: Calm down on mental sarcasm. It's annoying and confusing.
So of course, I, being the outstanding idiot that I am decide to jump out the window and help out. Now that your all up to date, let me explain to you the lovely sword that this assassin (NOT THUG) is carrying.
"What the bloody life!" I yell as I duck, trying to not get decapitated.
"Watch out. They have swords." Guy says.
NO DUH, CAPTAIN OBVIOUS!
I pick up a metal trash can hurl it into the assassin's ugly face.
Actually, he was kind of cute, but we're going to ignore that.
Execpt. I just mentioned it.
Whoops.
I kicked the distracted assassin in the stomach and grab Guy's arm.
He followed me into my apartment. I closed and locked the door.
A sword jabed it's way through.
"You know," I say as I walk towards my room, "usually during a hurricane, people go to their bathrooms. How about we not do that this time?"
"What..."
"I'll take that as a yes, because it's longer than a no."
"But it's longer that yes too." He remarked.
"Well then we'll go with maybe, and then work from there." I smiled and opened my door.
"How is this going to help us?" He asked.
"Window!" I told him as I closed the door.
Something crashes. Welp. Now I don't have to worry about that bullet hole in the kitchen wall. Bigger fish. Like a door bigger.
Except, you can't fry a door. Or a bullet hole for that matter.
Whatever.
Guy has already climbed through the window, so I follow suit.
We stand on top of a staircase that leads to the ground and roof.
My door crashes open and Guy starts climbing up.
Nice thinking.
I follow him, but the assassins follow me. Sweet. Just like the old days.
Running from people that want to kill you. Saving a damsel in distress. Well, not exactly a damsel, but they all start to become ugly after you start hating everyone.
Meh.
We reach the roof.
I've done this before. Ish. So, I already have a plan.
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Welcome To The Titans
FanfictionAn enemy of the League of Shadows finds herself in Gotham and helps a man fend off a few thugs trying to mug him. Turns out, they weren't thugs, or trying to mug the poor guys, and the guy wasn't even poor. He was Bruce Wayne. And somehow, he leads...