A Four-legged Friendship [COMPLETED]

Chapter 3

"So your birthday's coming up..." says Tanvi slowly.

"And? I bet so is a thousand other people's", I say, shrugging it off.

"And...you are not planning to celebrate it?" asks Tanvi, tentatively.

"Nope."

"Please dont be so hard on yourself. You should relax and enjoy a little. She would have wanted you to-"

"If she would have wanted me to, she would have been here, to tell me that herself. But she isnt. So I dont care. I'm not going to celebrate being born, when I cant even grieve someone dying, properly", I say with finality, a lump forming in my throat. No Alia, dont cry. Crying is for those who arent strong. For weak people. For people who believe in God. For people who believe that hope still exists somewhere in this world. Not for you, Alia. Dont forget. Steel exterior, steel interior. You dont feel a thing.

"Dont shut down your emotions like that, Alia, please", Tanvi begs for like the hundredth time. "For me, please."

"Tanvi dont try to blackmail me emotionally because you know its not going to work. I'm done here. I'm going home. See you on Monday."
I turn around and walk away from her without looking back. I know I must have hurt her again, but I'll make it up to her. Later.

I really want to be alone right now.

***
The worst thing about Sunday- its a perfect example of how an idle mind can be a devil's workshop. I woke up this Sunday feeling sleepy, although I slept till 11 am.

My mom didnt wake me up, neither did I ask. My dad hardly ever talks to me anymore, since I blamed him for everything that happened.

For everything thats wrong in my life right now.

Ever since that day, I've pretty much kept to myself. I hardly ever talk to my parents, they have tried but failed in talking to me. They are clueless as to what to do next.

But none of it matters. Not anymore anyway. Not since she's gone. And left me to deal with my mess alone.

If she would have been here, she would have laughed at my situation. She would have said, "Di, you were a happy go lucky girl. You still are. You are just focusing on the bad part. The part which was out of your control. You are pretty much a queen of this palace", she would have said indicating our huge house. My dad is a very successful architect, and my mom is a doctor. "You know they love you more than they love me", she would have said joking and acting hurt. She would have laughed. She would have been here...

My little sister, Ananya.

Ever since Ananya and dad's accident, life has changed. He was driving the car, and they were coming to the airport to pick me and mom up. We had just been visiting my nani- my maternal grandmother. Ananya was so excited to pick us up. Especially me. I loved my sister more than anything else in this world. Until the truck came and banged them. Until the car turned into a pretzel. Until my sister was rushed to the ICU. Until my father survived without a scratch. Until I told my father the same day that the accident was his fault. Until the doctors came to us, solemnly held my father's hand and said "We are really sorry.." Until I heard my mother's wails. Until I heard my father collapse. Until I saw my whole world tearing apart in front of my eyes.

But now I dont love Ananya anymore. Now I love my peace and quiet. Now I love my silence. Now I love not being attached to anybody emotionally. Not even Tanvi. Not even my parents. Now I love being rock hard- so solid that nothing can penetrate it. Not even any person dying. Especially not any person dying. I love being strong. I love being hollow and empty inside.

So many thoughts on a Sunday.. They are flowing like a stream through my head. Distinctly I can hear my mother saying, "We are going out for sometime." I hear my father say, "I think she's sleeping, Anita. Lets not disturb her." I have locked my bedroom door again. I have pretty much been in my room the entire day. Listening to songs. Watching movies. Reading books. Doing anything but thinking...

I dont want to think about Ananya's laugh. Or her smile. Or the way her eyes twinkle when she smiles. Just like Siddharth. I dont want to think about the conversation Ananya and I had, our last conversation, before me and mom left for Pune. "Di", she said. "Di, I miss you so much. Its been fun with dad too, but not the kind of fun that we have. I'm so glad I'm done with my exams. Now we can play. I can show you how to cook maggi finally", she joked, then added seriously,"I hate not sleeping next to you, even though I know I have a huge room of my own. Dont leave me again, Di. Ever." After that I soothed her, and told her I would always be with her.

They say life works in mysterious ways. Mine is the biggest mystery ever. If I'm not gonna be around to watch myself graduate, fall in love, get married, help my parents in old age, live my dream, why do those things in the first place anyway? I mean, I didnt have a dream as such while growing up. Ananya did. She wanted to be a pilot. But her dream got snatched. I didnt want to fall in love with anyone. Ananya did. She said, her age, the sweet sixteen, was perfect for her first crush at least. But her love life ended before the characters even entered her life. I didnt want to handle any responsibility. Especially not of my parents. Ananya did. Apart from me, mom and dad meant the world to her. She vowed she would never leave them and go. Well she did. She left me too. She was selfish. Selfish to go first. She could have thought about me. About mom and dad. The little jerk. I hate her right now. But in reality I dont.

With all these confusing, excessive thoughts in my head, I finally fall asleep.

***
I wake up at around 7pm. I freshen up a bit and head downstairs to find something to eat. Ananya used to joke that I was a ruminating cow, since I ate so much, and that they could really use my potty as a fertilizer or manure or something.

I hear the lock turn and the door open. "Alia?" Somebody calls. Mom and dad are home. I put the chocolate bar that I've been eating in the fridge, jump off the counter, wash my hands, and walk towards the Great Hall. Ananya and I had nicknamed our living room as the Great Hall, from Harry Potter series, because it looks similar.

"Whats up?" I ask my parents.

They look at each other before answering.

"We have a birthday surprise for you!" exclaims mom.

I narrow my eyes. "What kind of surprise?"

My dad points to a box on the floor.
"Open it", he says. Okay now thats weird, because dad never talks to me these days.

"But my birthday is tomorrow", I argue.

"Just open it, Alia".

I walk slowly towards the box and almost open it. It has been moving a little. I narrow my eyes suspiciously towards it.

"You sure?" I ask my dad, and he nods.

I open the box and there inside it, is something furry. It is white-brown. Its eyes find mine. It lets out a "woof" before trying to climb out of the box.

Meanwhile I shriek out, fall hard on my hip, swear and scream loudly "What the hell is that?!"