ROSÉ -corpse husband-

US (4)

WARNING: none of the content creators mentioned in this chapter are based off of true fact. they are simply posing as characters in the story.

CORPSE / PAST: MID JULY 2020
five years after

    Corpse stumbled from his desk, crumbling onto his bed.

For once, he was grateful that his desk had been moved into his room, instead of it's usual place in the spare bedroom.

Her room, now.

Corpse groaned.

He couldn't find the effort to take off his jeans, let alone slip under the comforter. His back was aching, and he had only been sitting at his desk for nearly thirty minutes before the pain was unbearable. He had to produce something while he still could. Anything.

    Corpse hadn't posted on Youtube in nearly three months, and now, with his chronic pain progressively getting worse, he didn't plan to post anytime soon. He physically couldn't. He debated calling an ambulance before deciding against it. Calling an ambulance meant medical bills he couldn't afford and leaving his house. He hated that, but he hated this pain more.

    He groaned loudly, before willing his eyes to open and his knees to move up under him. If he could just sit up a little bit, to pull down the blanket and crawl into bed, he would be okay. If he could reach his nightstand to find his phone, he could call someone. Anyone.

    Corpse reminded himself it had been worse before. There had been times when he was crawling to get his groceries from the front door, and he couldn't lift his arms to eat cereal. He had been worse.

But at least Eden at been there to feed you.

Stop.

He should be grateful that he could move at all.

    But this was hell. Every part of it was unfair.

    He was supposed to be a young, 22 year old healthy male. He had worked so hard on his physique throughout his life, and here he was, barely able to move, gaining weight much too quickly. It was humiliating.

    The only thing he was grateful for was that his friends didn't live in this country, and they had no desire to come see him in the middle of a global pandemic. It made it easier to handle how different he looked. It was nice of them not to mention it when they did see him on video calls though.

    Corpse's finger tips finally reached his phone on his nightstand. He hadn't realized it was three in the morning, and he hadn't slept in nearly 27 hours now.

    Shit, he had promised he would get better about that.

He wondered for a second if Eden was home. He shook his head. Not your problem anymore.

But if Eden was here, she could take care of you. 

Corpse clenched his eyes shut, willing his brain to stop. He wasn't supposed to think like that, not anymore.

    He dialed Dave's number, hoping his best friend was awake to provide some sort of solace to this incredibly shitty situation.

    "Hey," Dave greeted quietly. "I'm not streaming, but I'm playing with some of the guys. Among Us..."

    Corpse willed himself not to become sensitive over the newfound information. He had expected this to come when Dave started talking about their friends again, and how often he spoke to them.

    Although they were all mutually acquainted through Dave, Corpse had never met any of the people Dave played with. Full of people older than him, Corpse had a hard time fitting in with them, making him more anxious and uncomfortable than he was willing to admit. Dave had tried to introduce Corpse to them on multiple occasions, but Corpse refused.

    "Oh, I'm sorry. Ill talk to you, later," Corpse rushed out, before hanging up the phone, tears filling his eyes.

    Dave was his only friend now, and he had been whisked back into his older friend group, leaving Corpse in the dust.

    Deep down, he knew he was being dramatic. Dave had invited him to play. It was Corpse's fault really; he was pushing himself away from Dave, not the other way around.

    He knew he would receive texts from Dave later, asking if he was okay, and Corpse had already formulated the text back full of lies before he clicked on Loey's contact. She was harder to get ahold of at this hour, but maybe she would still be awake, playing Animal Crossing.

    Corpse had intentionally been avoiding her, if he was being honest. Loey was amazing, and he was incredibly attracted to her nurturing nature and openness with him. But, Corpse couldn't be with Loey Lane the way she deserved, and he knew it, even if she was okay with suppressing her emotions for him at the expense of herself.

    She would be okay eventually, but he didn't want to rub it in her face that he wasn't good enough for her.

    He wasn't over Eden. Not yet, and he didn't want Loey to deal with the emotional turmoil it would inevitably put him through, when he did finally give up on her.

    She didn't pick up, and Corpse hesitated before leaving a long voicemail, voice growing raspier as he spoke into his phone. He talked through as much as he could, simply ranting before the dial tone sounded. He had taken too long.

    His finger hovered over the un-named number he recognized by heart, still trapped in his messages. He considered calling for a moment before deciding against it. She was still upset with him. She wouldn't want to hear from him. Not now, and probably not ever.

    He sighed, and tossed his phone somewhere on his bed, curling into himself under the comforter, hoping to fall asleep.