The S.H.I.E.L.D. Files

Secret Agent Sighting

Timeline: 2010, before Iron Man 2; non-canon

Summary: S.H.I.E.L.D agents Natasha Romanoff and Clint Barton are undercover in Rome, Italy to stop the city from being destroyed... plus some sight-seeing. Parody.

In the beautiful city of Rome, Italy, tourists and locals alike bustled around, enjoying the bright summer day. There were tables to sit with gelato or other Italian treats. Long lines wove around the city outside museums and landmarks. Salesmen walked around, shouting about their wares to the tourists. It was a perfect day to enjoy the sights. No one was aware of the danger at Rome's doorstep.

A man stood amongst them. Nothing was remarkable about him. He wore the stereotypical clothes of a tourist complete with shades. Despite the summer heat, he didn't even break a sweat. No one bat an eye at him, which was exactly what he intended.

The only person to really pay any attention to him was an Italian salesman selling selfie sticks.

"Selfie stick! Selfie stick! Five euro. Selfie stick." He waved the product in the man's face. When he didn't budge, the man took the hint. "No? Okay. Selfie stick! Five euros." To the foreigner's relief, the salesman moved on to pressure another victim.

Across the square, a woman with red hair watched the exchange with an amused smirk hidden behind a brochure. Like the man, she wore dark shades to protect her eyes from the bright sun. Although no one else found him extraordinary, Natasha Romanoff knew better. She would recognize that brown hair and athletic build with archer biceps anywhere. Fury didn't tell her who she would be rendezvousing with at 16:00, but it was no surprise that he would send STRIKE Team: Delta into an op as dire as this. Just for fun, she decided as she crossed the road, she will use the code.

Casually, she stepped beside Clint Barton, pretending to read the map.

"Looks like rain."

Without breaking composure, Barton responded smoothly, "I could let you borrow my slicker."

Nat allowed the corner of her mouth to quirk upward as she folded the paper. "Agent Barton. Excellent. We've located the warhead. It's located at the Piazza di Santa Maria."

"Roger."

"On my mark, break left. Mark!" Natasha quickly began to walk to the left until she realized she was alone. Startled, she glanced back to see Clint still standing at the rendezvous. She hurried back. "Is something wrong? Why aren't you breaking left?" Was he compromised? Was she trying to tell her they were being watched?

"I did."

"No, you just stayed where you are. This rendezvous is over. Move out." The S.H.I.E.L.D agent broke left again only to discover that her best friend was still not following her. With a huff of frustration and growing worry, Natasha returned to the spot. "See? Why aren't you–" She glanced behind him to find a line for the Colosseum tour. "Are you in this line?"

"Wha? No," Clint scoffed. The line in front of him moved slightly. Almost sheepishly, Clint took a step with it.

Nat whipped off her sunglasses. "Are you kidding me? We're on an extremely time-sensitive mission and you're sight-seeing?"

Barton removed his shades, revealing his pleading and eager blue eyes. "I've never been to Rome before! Bella Roma!" He gestured to the historical city with a sweep of his arms.

Romanoff gripped the collar of his shirt. "There isn't gonna be a "bella Roma" if you don't take care of this!"

"All the more reason to see it now."